Whew. I made it through my first mother's day as a motherless mongrel. I didn't do too badly, actually. I had a watery moment when Mike called his mom because I wanted to call MY mom so bad. But I made it - one day at a time.
5/14/2007
5/13/2007
Happy Mother's Day
This post is dedicated to my mom, Linda. Please take a moment today and say a prayer or light a candle in memory of her.
For Mom
Linda Harris, 01/18/49 - 08/25/06
"Make yourself familiar with the angels, and behold them frequently in spirit; for without being seen, they are present with you." -- Saint Francis de Sales
For Mom
Linda Harris, 01/18/49 - 08/25/06
"Make yourself familiar with the angels, and behold them frequently in spirit; for without being seen, they are present with you." -- Saint Francis de Sales
5/10/2007
5/09/2007
Brilliant!
I want cookies. I'm hungry and I can practically smell them. I'll bake some! Brilliant! Hrm. No eggs. No vanilla. No brown sugar. I'll go to the store! Brilliant!
No car. I'll walk! Brilliant!
I'm hungry and I'll end up with 4,000 things when I only went for 3. I'll have to carry all that stuff back. I'll borrow a shopping cart and take it back when I'm done! Brilliant!
Dominick's has a new anti-theft device on their shopping carts. They lock up if you take them beyond the perimeter of the parking lot. Mike likes cookies. Mike will want cookies! I'll make Mike take me to the store when he gets home. Brilliant!
I'm hungry now. Mike doesn't get home until 5:00. Poop.
I hate that!
Don't you just hate it when you look at your checking account online and are dazzled by the amount of money you have...only to realize that your rent check hasn't cleared yet and you don't have as much money as you'd thought.
*Sigh*
Stupid rent.
*Sigh*
Stupid rent.
How do I love thee?
Today my Aunt Linda blogged about my mom and how my Uncle Mike misses her. Uncle Mike 
was Mom's baby brother and you would be hard pressed to find anyone she loved more. Now there are a variety of reasons why she loved Uncle Mike but tonight I'd like to share one very simple reason that *I* do.
When my mom had her first heart attack, there was a few days where we seemed to float in limbo - not knowing what the whole story was. At first it was a blood clot, then a mild heart attack, then a medium one, then more serious. Every day her condition seemed to get more serious but the doctors weren't in a big hurry to do anything and so I tried not to worry too much about it. Then all of a sudden one day, things seemed to go bad all at once. Her blood pressure took a nose dive and they decided to air care her to Genesis in the Quad Cities - where they specialize in heart related surgeries etc. They heliport-ed her up there, took her in immediately for a cardiac catheterization and put four stents in her arteries.
It could have been a disaster, but it wasn't. She survived. I, mercifully, was unaware of what was going on until it was all over. My dad didn't call my cell phone and I didn't get home from work until after 9 p.m. While I hate that I didn't know what was happening, I was spared a lot of heartache and worry - for which I am grateful.
Now I was not there to witness this but I heard it from my mom on numerous occasions. It was a "favorite" of her war stories...if you can have favorite stories about heart surgeries. (Her absolute favorite being my Mike's "homicide attempt" against her while she was recovering.) Only seven months passed between my mom's surgery and her death but I probably heard this seven or more times. She could never get all the way through the story without tearing up.
In the first hours/day or so after her surgery, the prognosis was good but guarded. It was still the early stages and there were no guarantees. My Aunt Linda and Uncle Mike had been at the hospital when things went bad with my mom and they went with my Dad to Genesis when they air cared her out. They sat with her while she came out of anesthesia. She was groggy and didn't remember much of anything after the surgery but she remembered Mike being there. (At this point in the story, she'd get teary and sniffle her way through the rest.) He stayed with her until she was awake enough to recognize him and know that he was there with her. That meant so much to her - that he'd stayed. And that he wouldn't leave until she knew he was there. She felt so loved.
Like I said, there are a bunch of reasons to love Uncle Mike but that's one of mine. And, for me, it's a big one.
was Mom's baby brother and you would be hard pressed to find anyone she loved more. Now there are a variety of reasons why she loved Uncle Mike but tonight I'd like to share one very simple reason that *I* do.When my mom had her first heart attack, there was a few days where we seemed to float in limbo - not knowing what the whole story was. At first it was a blood clot, then a mild heart attack, then a medium one, then more serious. Every day her condition seemed to get more serious but the doctors weren't in a big hurry to do anything and so I tried not to worry too much about it. Then all of a sudden one day, things seemed to go bad all at once. Her blood pressure took a nose dive and they decided to air care her to Genesis in the Quad Cities - where they specialize in heart related surgeries etc. They heliport-ed her up there, took her in immediately for a cardiac catheterization and put four stents in her arteries.
It could have been a disaster, but it wasn't. She survived. I, mercifully, was unaware of what was going on until it was all over. My dad didn't call my cell phone and I didn't get home from work until after 9 p.m. While I hate that I didn't know what was happening, I was spared a lot of heartache and worry - for which I am grateful.
Now I was not there to witness this but I heard it from my mom on numerous occasions. It was a "favorite" of her war stories...if you can have favorite stories about heart surgeries. (Her absolute favorite being my Mike's "homicide attempt" against her while she was recovering.) Only seven months passed between my mom's surgery and her death but I probably heard this seven or more times. She could never get all the way through the story without tearing up.
In the first hours/day or so after her surgery, the prognosis was good but guarded. It was still the early stages and there were no guarantees. My Aunt Linda and Uncle Mike had been at the hospital when things went bad with my mom and they went with my Dad to Genesis when they air cared her out. They sat with her while she came out of anesthesia. She was groggy and didn't remember much of anything after the surgery but she remembered Mike being there. (At this point in the story, she'd get teary and sniffle her way through the rest.) He stayed with her until she was awake enough to recognize him and know that he was there with her. That meant so much to her - that he'd stayed. And that he wouldn't leave until she knew he was there. She felt so loved.
Like I said, there are a bunch of reasons to love Uncle Mike but that's one of mine. And, for me, it's a big one.
5/08/2007
40 Perspectives
Do we really need a book that looks at Winston Churchill from 40 different perspectives? Really? 
Tales from a gym journal
So, I got a site meter which tells me how many people visit me in the blogosphere. I was playing around with options and it was free - so why not? It tells me where you are, how long you stay, how many pages you view, what website you click in from (if any), if you used a search engine to get there, it'll tell me what you were looking for, which of my links you use to click off from and your median income. Ok, I made that last one up. Hee hee. It does offer to show me the latitude and longitude of your location, though - so prepare to be stalked. I'll be the one outside of your house in the rain shouting, "But we have a CONNECTION. We're meant to be together!"
Anyway, most of the locations, I recognize. It doesn't always tell me exactly what town you're in - it's
actually where your IP address is based out of which may be somewhere nearby but not the same exact city. It's sort of a fun game..."Oh...there's Aunt Linda. That's Jeff. Sara in the hizz-ouse. That's gotta be dad. Rachael visited at 2:24 a.m. - what the heck's she doing up that late?" Kristie made her monthly visit to the blog. Geez, Kristie...where's the love? I'm interesting ALL THE TIME. :D
What was I saying? Oh yeah - so I'm scrolling down the list and playing my "who's who" game. I notice that there are two stops from Chapel Hill, NC. I click on it and it turns out this person was looking for "gym journal" in a search engine and was pointed to our little section of cyberspace. I had to LAAAAUGH. Two archive entries about how I hate the gym and I'm labeled as a gym journal.
That's right - this is a gym journal. Just call me Buff Betty. :D Which may, interestingly enough, become my roller derby name when I'm (hopefully) rolling for the Windy City Rollers in a year or two. But that's a story for another day.
Enjoy the day, kids. It's nice out.
Anyway, most of the locations, I recognize. It doesn't always tell me exactly what town you're in - it's
actually where your IP address is based out of which may be somewhere nearby but not the same exact city. It's sort of a fun game..."Oh...there's Aunt Linda. That's Jeff. Sara in the hizz-ouse. That's gotta be dad. Rachael visited at 2:24 a.m. - what the heck's she doing up that late?" Kristie made her monthly visit to the blog. Geez, Kristie...where's the love? I'm interesting ALL THE TIME. :DWhat was I saying? Oh yeah - so I'm scrolling down the list and playing my "who's who" game. I notice that there are two stops from Chapel Hill, NC. I click on it and it turns out this person was looking for "gym journal" in a search engine and was pointed to our little section of cyberspace. I had to LAAAAUGH. Two archive entries about how I hate the gym and I'm labeled as a gym journal.
That's right - this is a gym journal. Just call me Buff Betty. :D Which may, interestingly enough, become my roller derby name when I'm (hopefully) rolling for the Windy City Rollers in a year or two. But that's a story for another day.
Enjoy the day, kids. It's nice out.
5/07/2007
Back by popular demand
I thought since the picture of Matt was so popular, I'd add another one. I "borrowed" the following survey from Kelly and I would just like to say right up front that I wasn't involved in the numbering process - it was like that when I got it.100 Things You may not have Known About Me...
1. What is the last alcoholic beverage you drank?A Mimosa last weekend
2. Do you follow college football?A little.
3. How many miles does your car have on it?No car.
4. Who was the last person to send you a text message and what was it about?Mike saying, “Call me!”
5. Last time you went swimming in a pool? I don’t remember.
6. Are you happy?Sometimes
7. Where was the last place you went shopping?Online – buying a Trogdor the Burninator shirt for our friend Sergio’s birthday
8. How do you feel about your hair?I’m glad I have some. (Sorry, Dad)
9. Where do you work?Officially I’m on “sabbatical” from East-West University
10. Last thing you ate?Blue Cheese salad with bacon and almonds.
11. Do you wish you were someplace else right now?On vacation.
12. Hey! Where is number 12? Huh?
13. Do you have any expensive jewelry?Let’s see. Engagement ring, wedding ring, my mom’s wedding ring, gold memory locket with my mom’s hair, ruby earrings, my mom’s diamond earrings. A few things, I guess.
14. AIM or MSN?Neither. Who has the time?
15. What classes are you taking now?I’m finishing up (finals week – woo hoo!) Legal Research II, Civil Litigation II and Legal Computer Applications
16. How many hours on average do you work a week:What part of sabbatical don’t you understand? :D
17. Who do you like right now?Ugh – who don’t I like?
18. Favorite NFL team?Da Bears.
19. Do you watch the Olympics?Nah.
20. Last restaurant you went to?Max and Erma’s
21. Who was the last person to call you?Kristina
22. Whats your sign?Pisces
23. Do you have a favorite number?17
24. Last time you did volunteer work or made any donation?I donated my extra turkey sandwich to a homeless person on my wedding anniversary. We donated clothes in April too.
25. What do you spend the majority of your money on?Bills, I guess. Rent – I do live in Chicago. :D
26. Where does most of your family live?Iowa and Michigan
26. Where does most of your family live?Iowa and Michigan
27. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?I have bruddas.
29. Ever been called a bitch?Oh, yeah.
30. Got any guilty pleasures?Soda.
31. Do you drink beer?I’d rather eat glass.
32. Have you ever experienced true love?Yes.
33. Did you ever collect Beanie Babies?Kinda.
34. Ever ordered anything online?Hell, yeah.
35. Myspace or Facebook?What the? I’m 30, not 19.
36. Do you have T-Mobile?No.
37. What is your favorite subject?16th and 17th Century Literature
38. Do you sometimes wish you were someone else?No.
38. Do you sometimes wish you were someone else?No.
39. Do you usually fall for the "bad boys or slutty girls"?I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it’s stupid.
40. Were you an outcast in high school?No.
41. Last time you saw your parents?My dad – about 6 weeks ago.
My mom – August 6, 2006 (The last time I was home before she died.)
My mom – August 6, 2006 (The last time I was home before she died.)
42. Do you have any talents?Too numerous to mention, naturally.
43. Ever been in a wedding?Yes.
44. Do you have any children?Not yet.
45. Last movie you watched?Elizabethtown
46. Are you missing anyone at the moment?Yes. My mom.
47. Did you take a nap today?Nope – too busy doing last minute stuff for school.
48. What was your high school's mascot?Panthers.
49. Ever been on a cruise?Yes – my honeymooooooooooooooooooon.
50. Favorite vacation spot?Any place with Mike and no work.
52. Do you have any wealthy friends?I dunno – nobody who makes it worth my while to be their friend, anyways.
53. Ever met anyone famous before?Yes – sort of. I helped Vince Vaughn find a taxi once (well, I was there when he asked where to go to get one), opened the door for the Prince of Japan and sold Jeff Foxworthy a ticket to the Field Museum.
54. Favorite actor?Johnny Depp, Tommy Lee Jones
55. Favorite actress?Not Hilary Swank.
56. Are you multi-tasking right now?Yes.
57. Could you handle being in the military?No.
58. Are you hungry or thirsty?Neither
59. Favorite fast food restaurant?Taco Bell
61. What is your average cell phone bill?I don’t pay it.
62. Do you own a camera phone?Yes.
63. Ever had to take a sobriety test?No.
64. Do you believe in Karma?I guess so – I prefer to call it “What goes around, comes around.”
65. Can you speak any other languages?A little Spanish, a very little Polish
66. Last time you went to the gym or worked out?May 1, 2007
67. How many pairs of shoes do you own?None of your business, nosy!
68. Do you have a photo hosting site that you use?No.
69. Last place you drove your car:Helloooooooo? Don’t have a car of my own.
70. Play a musical instrument?Yeah. Piano, saxophone, French Horn.
71. Ever been to Las Vegas?Yes.
Hey! Where are 72 - 74!?Ask me if I care.
75. What do you think is your best feature?Ask Mike – I’m married now and I don’t have to worry about stuff like that.
76. Have you ever been gambling?Yuh.
77. How old are your parents?Dad is 60. Mom is deceased – but would be 58.
78. When is the last time you updated your blog?Follow along, please. I’m doing it right now.
79. Do you have your wisdom teeth?Nope. Not since July 19, 1996.
80. Favorite place to be?Anywhere with Mike.
81. Have you been to New York City?No.
82. Favorite sit down restaurant?Carson’s
83. Ever been to Disney?Yes.
84. Do you have a favorite cartoon character?Pucca.
85. Last thing you cooked?Homemade pizza.
86. How is the weather today?Slightly cloudy but nice.
87. Do you email?Yes.
88. Last letter/piece of mail you received besides junk or a bill?A card from Sarah jane.
89. Favorite store?Target, Borders, Myopic Books
90. Are you dating someone right now?Boy wouldn’t Mike be mad if I was.
91. Last voicemail you received?Mike.
92. Do you drunk dial?No.
93. Stupidest thing you ever did with your cell phone?Put it through the washing machine.
94. What is the best city in the state that you have lived in?Sweet home Chicago
95. Favorite band?I dunno – I can’t narrow it down.
96. Last time you were sick?Really down and dirty sick as a dog? December, 2006.
97. Are you bored right now?Kinda. Are you?
98. Last concert you went to??Lil Stubby and the Disappointments with Mike and my in-laws.
100. What are your plans for tomorrow?Sitting through a bunch of presentation on legal topics. Blech.
5/05/2007
Update
I got a sunburn! My first of the year.
I shouldn't be surprised. If I even look out the window on a sunny day, I pink up.
Darn genetics!
I shouldn't be surprised. If I even look out the window on a sunny day, I pink up.
Darn genetics!
Take Me Out to the Ball Game
So I have just been to my very first major league baseball game. Ever. So THAT's what all the fuss is about! Awesome. It probably helped that the Cubs won the game. The mood at Wrigley was festive. We went to the game because today is our friend Sergio's birthday. (Happy birthday, Sergio!) His girlfriend bought eight bleacher seats for him to invite friends. I wasn't going to go but they had an extra ticket and Mike convinced me. "It's the CUBS, Cindi." I figured...why not? If it's boring, I'll have plenty of people to talk to to keep me entertained. In the car on the way to Sergio's house before the game, Mike randomly turned to me and said, "We're going to a CUBS game." Just like a kid.I was sitting inbetween Mike and our friend Greg...who amuses me just about as much as any one person on the planet can ever amuse me. Amid watching the game and discussing the absurd ratio of cotton candy guys vs. hot dog guys (4:1), we also engaged in a heated debate involving the parameters of Generation X. Greg claims I am not a member of Generation X because I did not see Star Wars: A New Hope in the movie theater. I question his requirements.
It became clear that the hot dog guy was not going to make his way back to the bleachers section - so we had to dispatch a hot dog "envoy" to bring us back some tasty treats. Mike and Greg decided to head out and get some beer, soda and hot dogs for our little crew. Greg made it all the way back from wherever it is (in WISCONSIN) that they have the food-and-beer place located at Wrigley Field without spilling. He makes it all the way back and is standing next to me when he is thrown off balance somehow and splatters himself and the two rows in front of us with beer. Luckily one row in front of us was still part of our group and the row in front of them was caught with only minimal sprayage. Greg cleaned up the seats with the napkins while we heckled him mercilessly. He finished the clean up and sat down...on his hotdogs. He'd set them down behind him so he had both hands free for clean up. It was the funniest thing. Greg keeps cracking jokes at his own expense and we're all holding our sides - laughing so hard we're crying.
Who needs a game when you've got entertainment like that?
P.S. I had peanuts but was unable to locate any Cracker Jacks. I feel a little cheated. I did eat three hot dogs, though. Sergio's girlfriend put it this way...and I have to agree. "Baseball...come for the hot dogs, stay for the game." Yummy.
5/04/2007
Oh, tell me have you seen...?
Today I "misplaced" my wallet. Well, yesterday sometime. I have no idea where it is. On the way to school last night, I stopped for a Jamba Juice. That's the last time I had it out. But today when I went to get it, it wasn't in my backpack. Joy.
I thought maybe I'd set it down in the car on the way to school after getting my smoothie but an inspection of Jean Claude (our car...Jean Claude Grand Am...get it? :D)... showed that there was no wallet. So, I've spent the evening cancelling and re-issuing credit card, debit card and finding out how to get my driver's license replaced. Luckily I never drive - so it's not an immediate priority. I do have to get ahold of my dad and have him send me a copy of my birth certificate so I can take it in with my passport and get it reissued.
What a week.
Irritation
We got a call on our answering maching today from the building's "manager." It seems our landlord will be back from Florida and will be taking over the garage behind our house. That means that even though we've paid for a parking spot for the month of May, we will be back to street parking. Oh we'll be getting our money back - make no mistake. I'll be deducting that amount from the rent we pay in June. But I'm a little irritated nonetheless.
Five more months and we can move. Feels like for-EVER.
Five more months and we can move. Feels like for-EVER.
5/03/2007
I have to get mad more often!
Mike is in disfavor today (actually it's yesterday - I didn't realize it was after midnight). It doesn't really matter why. He's aware. a) Sandy didn't raise no dummies.* b) I'm not subtle. I know he's aware because he's not doing any of his usual, "I think she's mad, let's see if I can charm her" routine. No puppy dog eyes, extra snuggles or rapid-fire cheek kisses. He's gone straight into "I'm in big trouble here, time to break out the big guns" mode. He stopped at CVS to pick up some stuff for me without me having to ask him to do it. He took me out to dinner. Though we do not actually speak about it out loud, we both know the score and where we stand. I decide to raise the stakes. "I want you to take me to Border's after dinner," I say. "Okay," He immediately replies.** Ahhh, yes. Game, set, match - Cindi.After dinner, he keeps his word and takes me down the street to the multi-level Border's store on North Ave. He asks if it's alright if he sits in the car while I go in. Uh..ye-AH. Like I need
him following me around the store. I hold out my hand for money. He gives me a $20 bill and whatever singles he has in his wallet. I snatch them up thinking I've hit the jackpot and turn with my hand on the door handle when I hear him speak from behind me. "Is that enough or do you want two $20's?" Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? For someone who is ALWAYS monitoring the balance in our savings account and fretting that we're dipping into it too much, I was WAAAAAAAY too tempted at the offer of extra book money. But, ever conscious of the fact that books are not a necessity, I merely savored (I closed my eyes and took a big, deep breath while the feeling enveloped me) the experience and said, "No, this is fine." It was delicious. Even more delicious than the enchiladas with extra cheese I had for dinner.
___________________________________________________________
*I know this is bad grammar. I did it on purpose.
**We did have the following conversation after he agreed. It's paraphrased but essentially accurate.
Mike: You want to go to Borders? You do still have money on that Barnes & Noble gift certificate.
Cindi: It's at home. Besides, I'm SAVING that. For a book emergency.
Mike: You're so weird.
***The pictures are of Mike's grandparents' Memorial Bench in Daytona Beach, FL. It has nothing to do with this post but I've been thinking I would post them for awhile. Yesterday at school I uploaded them to a blog entry and decided to use them as my "random pictures" of the day.
5/02/2007
Feeling Old
I got this graduation announcement in the mail today. It's one of my little cousins. I say little even though I know that he turned 18 last month. I felt SO old when I opened it. I remember once when I was about 14, Brandt, his older sister, Emily and his mom and dad visited us. It was the summer time and Brandt was probably 2. I remember because most of the family was over to our house and one of my other little cousins (Dustin) was there. Brandt's birthday was, I think, April 8 and Dustin's was 
April 18 of the same year. As I said, it was summer and we had one of those big above ground pools in our backyard. Matt and I took the "little" boys swimming. Neither one of them had swim trunks with them but my mom just shucked off their clothes and handed them to us with only a diaper on. They were too small to even touch the bottom of the pool. Brandt floated and splashed around while sitting on a blow-up raft - confident that I wouldn't let him drown but Dustin clung to my neck and refused to let go. He was enjoying himself but he wasn't about to let go of me. We had a really, really good time.Look at them now - the big brutes! I thought about that summer day when they were so little and trusting and then I looked at the pictures of the young men they have become and I felt a little old.
I got over it, though. I just thought about all the fun I'll have telling their girlfriends/fiances/wives about the time I swam with them in their underpants.
Ain't it the truth?
My friend Michelle (aka MooShu) sent this to me today:
"Whenever God closes one door He always opens another, even though sometimes it's Hell in the hallway."
"Whenever God closes one door He always opens another, even though sometimes it's Hell in the hallway."
Ohhhhhh Nooooooo!
I just did this to my bootleg-Dell-version ipod. I'm sitting at the computer. When I turned, I hooked my foot on the cord that connects the Dellpod to my computer and it fell to the floor. It fell THREE feet onto CARPET! Come ON! It still works but obviously there will be no pictures and/or video played on it EVER. And I can't see the menus to do anything except listen to it on the "play all" setting. Bueno. My day just keeps getting better and better. *sigh*
5/01/2007
A moment of larceny
Since I've already "borrowed" a picture off of Sara's blog, I decided I might as well continue to "borrow" from other people I know. Ok, just from Kelly. But I do so enjoy this picture of Mike and Bailey, the party pug. Hrm...perhaps I should check out Scott's site too and get a picture of Pablo to spice up this post. It will be pug-tastic. Beauty! Since I really don't have much of a clue what to write about today, pugs can only improve the content.So, I came to school really early today in order to make sure I completed a PowerPoint presentation that I needed to have done for class tonight. I would have been done ages ago if only I had access to PowerPoint at home. I'd written out what I was going to put on them, gathered the pictures and statistics for a graph and basically done everything I could possibly do without actu
ally being able to create slides. I was afraid that if I didn't get up and have Mike drop me off at Loyola on his way to work, I'd sleep in too late and fiddle around at home until I had waited too long to complete the assignment - or at least without enough time to really do it well. So I was here at about 7:30 this morning and I was done with the assignment at about 8:30. And that's including the time I took in the middle of the project to send three emails. Class starts at 6:00 p.m. tonight. I could go home but I do have a lot of other stuff that I need to get finished before finals next week. I work better away from home where I can't get distracted by kitties, movies or more interesting reading material. Or food. But basically, instead of going off in search of a chocolate chip cookie with which to entertain myself, I am instead avoiding my work by hopping around on the internet, gathering photos (pug-tastic though they may be) and posting blog entries which really have no point.Sorry - I saved this post while I went off to McNasty's to grab a breakfast sandwich. Then I came back and promptly forgot about it. I didn't make it to getting Pablo Pug-casso on here either. Poop. I'll have to post a Pablo picture sometime this week to even things out. For some reason I can't save pictures off of the internet to my computer at home. They won't load back up. But I can do it from school. Dunno. I'm not computer savvy enough to have Clue #1.
By the way, I wasn't sure if I'd spelled savvy correctly, so I decided to spell check this. It didn't highlight "savvy" so hopefully we're alright there...but I wouldn't be too sure. It highlighted internet every time it appeared and HALF of the word actually. Just the actu part. Yeah. I don't get it either. Words with two v's are funny. Not that I can think of any others. I actually had to look up the origin of the word. Yes, I'm a geek - we all know that. Move on. :D So, it comes from the "West Indies pidgin borrowing of French savez(-vous)? 'do you know?'" Thank you dictionary.com.
Speaking of dictionary.com. I deleted my "word of the day" from my email without really looking at it today and I am kicking myself! I went to look up savvy and found that today's word is "termagant!" Awesome word. Want to know what it means? Pft! Too bad. Look it up yourself. What do I look like...your mom?
So...good luck with that.
Another Charles original
My dad took this picture of Jeff and Jenn in Georgia on his vacation last week...or two weeks ago...whenever. I'm old-ish now, I lose track of time. What day is this? Where am I?Anyway, he took the picture and then he sent it to me via e-mail. A second success! Although he said he was going to send more and I haven't heard anything else yet. So we may have run into technical difficulties somewhere along the way. Stay tuned!
4/30/2007
Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday to my cousin, Sara. She's as old as me now! Oh, wait... there's a number on the cake...she's thirty and I turned twenty-five (25) on my birthday last month (as far as you know). Yeah, we went to high school together. Yeeeeees, we did graduate the same year. What? Two words...child prodigy.I shamelessly stole this picture from her blog. I prefer the term "borrowed," though. With kids as cute as hers, you have to expect it.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SARA! Welcome to your 30's...you'll have to tell me what it's like sometime. ;)
4/29/2007
Opening Day!!
Ok, I know this picture isn't really very kickball-ish but it is the only "athletic" picture that I have of Mike.Mike is off to play kickball and drink beer with other grown men. I, on the other hand, am at home searching for anything to do except work on the homework that I need to finish. I feel a little bad about not making it to opening day but I really do have things I need to work on. I'll be there next week - I hope, anyway. The semester's almost over and I'm ready for the break.
Update: Opening day SUCCESS! Mike's team won their first game 8-4.
4/24/2007
Huzzah!
My father is mastering the art of e-mail quite quickly. Today he managed to correctly load and e-mail me this picture he took in Stone Mountain during his vacation last week.Be sure to congratulate 'Ol Charlie on his accomplishment!
Way to go, Dad!
One more
I had decided that I was going to spice up these posts with a random picture here and there. I didn't want to post too many or I'll run out of good pictures too quickly! BUT, I had to post this one. Take a look at Mike's face in this picture and then look at the picture where I caught him eating a cookie month or two ago. Mike has wondered how it is that I can watch him on the phone and know what's being said by the other person even though I can't hear him/her. I tell him that if he doesn't want me know what he's talking about he'll need to get a new set of facial expressions. We've been together so long that I already know all of the current ones. Apparently there's not much hope of him really getting a new set when he's CLEARLY had these for so long. :D
Mike is nothing if not consistent. But then, there are definitely worse things he could be.
Compare and Contrast
Apparently these pictures were extremely popular during the late 1970's and early 1980's.
This one says, "Sep. 79." That makes Mike about two and a half and Kelly about six months.
This beauty is labeled "Feb. '81" on the back. I would have been three going on four and Matt...Mr. "Too-cool-for-school"...was about two months.
So really, he's just been cleverly posed and is too little to do anything except lie there like a slug. Note the Dukes of Hazzard sweatshirt and green shag carpeting. Nice.
This one says, "Sep. 79." That makes Mike about two and a half and Kelly about six months.
I fixed the shading as best I could, but you can still see the sepia hues of the 70's.
This beauty is labeled "Feb. '81" on the back. I would have been three going on four and Matt...Mr. "Too-cool-for-school"...was about two months.
So really, he's just been cleverly posed and is too little to do anything except lie there like a slug. Note the Dukes of Hazzard sweatshirt and green shag carpeting. Nice.
4/23/2007
Sad
Mike's Aunty Gertie has been sick and last night she lost her battle against the infection in her body. Please keep the family in your prayers.
4/22/2007
Anniversary Card
This is the card Mike got me for our first married anniversary. Nice, huh. There was no jewelry in it, though. Poop. Maybe next year. :D
Anniversary Day!
It's Mike's and my anniversary! 11 years together - 1 year married. Our friend Leigh took us out for an anniversary brunch at Kitsch'n yesterday and today, beautiful today, we're taking a picnic lunch downtown to Millenium Park. I'm trying not to be cranky. We were out until WAY too late last night...well, this morning. After we were out in the suburbs for the evening - going out to eat and what not - we ended up at our friend Sergio's. He just got Guitar Hero II for X-box and so we played that for HOURS. Plus drank anything that was left in the house, basically - and generally hung out. Mike kept saying, "We need to go soon." But somehow, Serg talked him into more Guitar Hero - or another beer. And when we finally walked out of his apartment, it was light outside. I was like, "No WAY." And so, Mike had to get up for guitar class today and he woke me up before he left because he wanted me to make the sandwiches and have the picnic ready to go when
he gets home. So I'm going on about five hours of sleep and I can feel a touch of crankiness lurking beneath the surface. I'm sure when I get outside in all that sunshine, it'll *poof* disappear.
he gets home. So I'm going on about five hours of sleep and I can feel a touch of crankiness lurking beneath the surface. I'm sure when I get outside in all that sunshine, it'll *poof* disappear. Besides...look how cute Mike is. :D How could I be anything but happy today?
ENJOY THE DAY! IT'S BEAUTIFUL OUT!
4/20/2007
Caleb's Post
This post is for Caleb...and you'll understand why eventually. Hang in there.
Yesterday, Mike and I were talking about how my mom could never tell a really funny joke. Well, ok...here's the story. We were waiting at a red light by the interstate and while we watched, this man in a Corvette (going about 400 mph) swooped around this pick up truck and narrowly (it seemed to me) escaped firey carnage by merging back onto the interstate with seconds to spare before the lane ended. Anyways, I looked at Mike and said:
Me: Do you know what the difference between a Corvette and a cactus is?
Now, Mike's heard this joke about a thousand times and I know he remembers it by the way he smiles when I ask the question. But it's a cute joke and so he plays along.
Mike: No...what?
Me: On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside.
(My apologies to Uncle Bob who owns a Corvette and is actually a very nice man)
I told Mike that the cactus joke was the only funny joke that my mom was ever able to tell me...at least properly. Then Mike and I started talking about her and laughing because whenever she had a really funny joke to tell, she'd start it out good but because she knew how funny it was, she'd stop and laugh in the middle and could never spit out the punchline because she was always laughing too hard. Usually it didn't matter whether we heard the joke because we'd all be laughing at her laughing too hard to tell the joke. It wasn't just jokes that she had this trouble with. Particularly funny stories about us were often told in the same fashion - with it taking forever to find out the point of the story because you'd have the wait until she could laugh her way through to the end. She had a great laugh. Anyway, one of the stories she could never make it all the way through was the one I'm about to tell you now.
When he was very young, my nephew had a real thing for Poke-mon. He was a fanatic. I imagine he was six or seven-ish. I was still in college but I was home for some reason. Anyway, the first pokemon movie came out and Mom and I decided that we'd take Cal to see it. He was SO excited, he was very well behaved and really enjoyed the movie. The first movie was about these scientists who were cloning pokemon and these cloned pokemon were isolated off on their own little clone-pokemon-reject island or something. Anyway, the REAL pokemon somehow stumble upon them (hey...it's been 10 years! Give me a break - I don't remember details). The pokemon start to fight each other because the REAL pokemon won't accept the CLONED pokemon because they're different but they are genetically the same, so it's just a big stand-off between them. Finally in the end, they had to band together as brothers to save the day. Anyway, being about 20 or 21-ish, I naturally knew EVERYTHING and was very smug about it, right? I was very impressed about how they had incorporated this message of tolerance into a kid's movie so smoothly. After it was over, we were ready to leave the movie theater and I turned to Mom and Caleb and said, "Cal, did you get the message that the movie was trying to tell you?" And Caleb said, "Yes. Don't fight somebody with your same powers because you can't win!" My mom thought that was about the funniest thing she ever heard. The first thing she did when she got home was tell my dad about what Caleb had said...well, she tried. I think I ended up telling the story because she was laughing so hard she was crying.
And so, for all the joy he brought my mother for the fifteen years they shared space on this Earth together - this post is for my favorite nephew, Caleb Harris. God love'em...he hasn't changed a bit since then. I hope he never does.
Yesterday, Mike and I were talking about how my mom could never tell a really funny joke. Well, ok...here's the story. We were waiting at a red light by the interstate and while we watched, this man in a Corvette (going about 400 mph) swooped around this pick up truck and narrowly (it seemed to me) escaped firey carnage by merging back onto the interstate with seconds to spare before the lane ended. Anyways, I looked at Mike and said:
Me: Do you know what the difference between a Corvette and a cactus is?
Now, Mike's heard this joke about a thousand times and I know he remembers it by the way he smiles when I ask the question. But it's a cute joke and so he plays along.
Mike: No...what?
Me: On a cactus, the pricks are on the outside.
(My apologies to Uncle Bob who owns a Corvette and is actually a very nice man)
I told Mike that the cactus joke was the only funny joke that my mom was ever able to tell me...at least properly. Then Mike and I started talking about her and laughing because whenever she had a really funny joke to tell, she'd start it out good but because she knew how funny it was, she'd stop and laugh in the middle and could never spit out the punchline because she was always laughing too hard. Usually it didn't matter whether we heard the joke because we'd all be laughing at her laughing too hard to tell the joke. It wasn't just jokes that she had this trouble with. Particularly funny stories about us were often told in the same fashion - with it taking forever to find out the point of the story because you'd have the wait until she could laugh her way through to the end. She had a great laugh. Anyway, one of the stories she could never make it all the way through was the one I'm about to tell you now.
When he was very young, my nephew had a real thing for Poke-mon. He was a fanatic. I imagine he was six or seven-ish. I was still in college but I was home for some reason. Anyway, the first pokemon movie came out and Mom and I decided that we'd take Cal to see it. He was SO excited, he was very well behaved and really enjoyed the movie. The first movie was about these scientists who were cloning pokemon and these cloned pokemon were isolated off on their own little clone-pokemon-reject island or something. Anyway, the REAL pokemon somehow stumble upon them (hey...it's been 10 years! Give me a break - I don't remember details). The pokemon start to fight each other because the REAL pokemon won't accept the CLONED pokemon because they're different but they are genetically the same, so it's just a big stand-off between them. Finally in the end, they had to band together as brothers to save the day. Anyway, being about 20 or 21-ish, I naturally knew EVERYTHING and was very smug about it, right? I was very impressed about how they had incorporated this message of tolerance into a kid's movie so smoothly. After it was over, we were ready to leave the movie theater and I turned to Mom and Caleb and said, "Cal, did you get the message that the movie was trying to tell you?" And Caleb said, "Yes. Don't fight somebody with your same powers because you can't win!" My mom thought that was about the funniest thing she ever heard. The first thing she did when she got home was tell my dad about what Caleb had said...well, she tried. I think I ended up telling the story because she was laughing so hard she was crying.
And so, for all the joy he brought my mother for the fifteen years they shared space on this Earth together - this post is for my favorite nephew, Caleb Harris. God love'em...he hasn't changed a bit since then. I hope he never does.
4/18/2007
Meaning-full
I just finished watching the last 90 minutes of Capote.
One of my friends once told me that I'm forever searching for hidden meanings underlying movies, stories etc. "Sometimes, " he said, "Sometimes there is no hidden meaning. Sometimes it is just a story." At the time, I just sort of said, "Yeah, yeah." And yet, here I am...still mulling over the movie and thinking about what it all meant.
You know how sometimes there is a line or a moment in a movie that sticks with you and you're unable to get it out of your head afterward? There was a line in this movie that really stuck with me.
"It's as if Perry and I grew up in the same house. And one day he stood up and went out the back door, while I went out the front."
For some reason, it's gotten me thinking about a guy I went to high school with. He was really a bit of a jerk, honestly. He was sullen, moody and seldom had anything pleasant to say to anyone. But for some reason - he liked me. And I don't mean, to use the high school vernacular, "like-liked" me. It was like having an extra brother. We never hung out but he'd drive me to and from marching band practice (We shared a field with the college in town, so it wasn't located at the school) and every once in awhile, he'd see me walking by and engage me in conversation..."Hey, Harris. 'Sup? You goin' to [insert generic high school activity here]?"
He was a good guy, though. Had a good heart under the moodiness. I think he felt a lot of pressure from his parents to succeed and so he had some sort of self-destructive impulse to do the opposite of what they wanted. It's hard to explain in a short post. Anyway, he always hung around these three other guys who, as my father says, "weren't worth the powder it would take to blow them up." Immature, always looking for trouble and, more often than not, finding it. I could never figure out what attracted him to that group. Wherever they went, whatever mess they got into - he was along for the ride. He got kicked off out of an extra-curricular activity because once, while they were at an away competition, the group went around town vandalizing cars. I remember being so mad at him for going with them and asking him, "What were you thinking?" the next time we spoke in the hall. He gave me a sort of lop-sided smile and shrugged. I knew then that he was most likely to have some unhappiness ahead.
I went off to college and didn't think about him for several years. Then, a few years ago, I heard he was in prison. He had been arrested for manufacturing crystal meth and was serving out his sentence.
I brooded about the news for awhile but "way leads on to way" and I hadn't really thought about him since then. But now a film about Truman Capote has got me thinking back and feeling the same sort of melancholy you feel when someone makes bad choices and suffers as a result. I have no idea where he is now or what he's doing. I hope he's doing well - as I hope for everyone I've lost touch with over the years.
But after I had thought about it for awhile, I realized that brooding about past events and other people's bad choices does them no good. And it certainly won't do me any good. We can't change the past by thinking about it. It's over...that's why it's the past. It's important to remember that sometimes or we get bogged down with regret.
Charles Swindoll said it best, I think.
"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company…a church…a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past…we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you…we are in charge of our attitudes."
One of my friends once told me that I'm forever searching for hidden meanings underlying movies, stories etc. "Sometimes, " he said, "Sometimes there is no hidden meaning. Sometimes it is just a story." At the time, I just sort of said, "Yeah, yeah." And yet, here I am...still mulling over the movie and thinking about what it all meant.
You know how sometimes there is a line or a moment in a movie that sticks with you and you're unable to get it out of your head afterward? There was a line in this movie that really stuck with me.
"It's as if Perry and I grew up in the same house. And one day he stood up and went out the back door, while I went out the front."
For some reason, it's gotten me thinking about a guy I went to high school with. He was really a bit of a jerk, honestly. He was sullen, moody and seldom had anything pleasant to say to anyone. But for some reason - he liked me. And I don't mean, to use the high school vernacular, "like-liked" me. It was like having an extra brother. We never hung out but he'd drive me to and from marching band practice (We shared a field with the college in town, so it wasn't located at the school) and every once in awhile, he'd see me walking by and engage me in conversation..."Hey, Harris. 'Sup? You goin' to [insert generic high school activity here]?"
He was a good guy, though. Had a good heart under the moodiness. I think he felt a lot of pressure from his parents to succeed and so he had some sort of self-destructive impulse to do the opposite of what they wanted. It's hard to explain in a short post. Anyway, he always hung around these three other guys who, as my father says, "weren't worth the powder it would take to blow them up." Immature, always looking for trouble and, more often than not, finding it. I could never figure out what attracted him to that group. Wherever they went, whatever mess they got into - he was along for the ride. He got kicked off out of an extra-curricular activity because once, while they were at an away competition, the group went around town vandalizing cars. I remember being so mad at him for going with them and asking him, "What were you thinking?" the next time we spoke in the hall. He gave me a sort of lop-sided smile and shrugged. I knew then that he was most likely to have some unhappiness ahead.
I went off to college and didn't think about him for several years. Then, a few years ago, I heard he was in prison. He had been arrested for manufacturing crystal meth and was serving out his sentence.
I brooded about the news for awhile but "way leads on to way" and I hadn't really thought about him since then. But now a film about Truman Capote has got me thinking back and feeling the same sort of melancholy you feel when someone makes bad choices and suffers as a result. I have no idea where he is now or what he's doing. I hope he's doing well - as I hope for everyone I've lost touch with over the years.
But after I had thought about it for awhile, I realized that brooding about past events and other people's bad choices does them no good. And it certainly won't do me any good. We can't change the past by thinking about it. It's over...that's why it's the past. It's important to remember that sometimes or we get bogged down with regret.
Charles Swindoll said it best, I think.
"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company…a church…a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past…we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you…we are in charge of our attitudes."
4/17/2007
The ball's in my court
Well, it's a good thing my dad's on vacation or I'd have heard about the fact that I haven't posted in over a week. I took comfort in the fact that Kelly and Scott hadn't posted either...my dad tends to gauge my postage based on Kelly - if she posts I'd better have something new up soon or I get a report because I haven't updated. Then I saw yesterday that Kelly posted. Dammit! Time to put the cattle prod to Mike and see if I can get him to post something! Don't hold your breath. :D
4/08/2007
Thanks, Kristie
"Mike is suggesting a Meme Cat benefit...how about some of those plastic containers at all of the grocery store registers? We need a color for her "benefit ribbon." " -from 03/28/07
All bettah
Meme is officially off of medication and out of a cone collar. Whoo! Of course the first thing she did when I took off her cone collar was to lick all of her scabs off. I started to freak out a little bit and then looked closer and saw that there was really no wound left underneath them anyway - so I was like, "Lick away." Now she has all this pink, raw, new skin with a little line where her incision was. She does still look a little like a bald bellied poodle. They shaved a line around both of her front legs to put in IV's and her whole belly is hairless.
She's gotten used to me holding and coddling her over the last 10 days, so she's been very clingy still. I'm savoring it because everyone tells me that, as she's spayed now, she'll soon be changing into a much less personable, more aloof feline. It certainly happened that way with Furio. He used to sleep curled around my head when he was little and then after we got him fixed he couldn't abide being held and cuddled.
But at least she's feeling better. She and Furio wrestled around for the first time in 10 days. He was a little freaked out by the collar and when she'd get too close to him wearing it, he'd take off running across the room. As my mom used to say, "What a wush." (She thought that was how you say 'wuss').
She's gotten used to me holding and coddling her over the last 10 days, so she's been very clingy still. I'm savoring it because everyone tells me that, as she's spayed now, she'll soon be changing into a much less personable, more aloof feline. It certainly happened that way with Furio. He used to sleep curled around my head when he was little and then after we got him fixed he couldn't abide being held and cuddled.
But at least she's feeling better. She and Furio wrestled around for the first time in 10 days. He was a little freaked out by the collar and when she'd get too close to him wearing it, he'd take off running across the room. As my mom used to say, "What a wush." (She thought that was how you say 'wuss').
4/05/2007
Last update - we hope!
Meme's bloodwork from yesterday returned with a normal white blood cell count which means that when she finishes her antibiotics and finishes her 10 days in the cone collar (Sunday) - she will be good as new! Minus one uterus...but good as new.
4/04/2007
Bad Mood
I'm in such a crabby mood today. I got up early to make an appointment with the vet for Meadow. Her antibiotics are almost done and the ER vets said she should probably be on them for 3 weeks. Plus she's been able to get around her cone collar and lick the bottom of her incision - so I wanted them too look and make sure she hadn't pulled any stitches or anything. Mike had a meeting at a high school down the street, so he left the car for us to use. What didn't he leave? The keys to the garage so that I could get to the car. So Meme and I had to take the bus...which put Meme in a GREAT mood, let me tell you.
But, there was lots of good news at the vet's. Incision looks good - it's not healed completely but it's "sealed" - which means it closed and the stitches dissolved. They decided to take her blood today to see if her white blood cell count is back to normal. (Meme was less than delighted.) If it is, then we're done with the meds. If it's still a little high, they'll continue them for another week.
Then we rode the bus home again. Once again, real fun for the cat. She's been hiding under the bed - pissed at me. She can't be on her own until Sunday, though. That's when the cone collar can come off and she can have full run of the house. So I'm stuck at home this weekend rather than celebrating Easter with either side of the family. Mike's still going home, I'm sure. I was hoping he'd want to stay with me and we could go to his parents' house next weekend for a late Easter visit...but I'm pretty sure that's not happening.
Due to cat-related expenses (Meme's turned into a real big ticket item) - the purse strings have necessarily been tightened. Thankfully the birthdays are over but it looks like our first anniversary is going to be a home-made spaghetti dinner and blockbuster rental night. But at least Meme will be around to curl up on the couch with us watching the movie.
Still - we could use something good happening to us instead of the things that HAVE been happening. I've had enough of parking tickets and sick cats. So everybody concentrate on sending some good ju-ju our way, ok?
I go take nap now. Bye-bye.
But, there was lots of good news at the vet's. Incision looks good - it's not healed completely but it's "sealed" - which means it closed and the stitches dissolved. They decided to take her blood today to see if her white blood cell count is back to normal. (Meme was less than delighted.) If it is, then we're done with the meds. If it's still a little high, they'll continue them for another week.
Then we rode the bus home again. Once again, real fun for the cat. She's been hiding under the bed - pissed at me. She can't be on her own until Sunday, though. That's when the cone collar can come off and she can have full run of the house. So I'm stuck at home this weekend rather than celebrating Easter with either side of the family. Mike's still going home, I'm sure. I was hoping he'd want to stay with me and we could go to his parents' house next weekend for a late Easter visit...but I'm pretty sure that's not happening.
Due to cat-related expenses (Meme's turned into a real big ticket item) - the purse strings have necessarily been tightened. Thankfully the birthdays are over but it looks like our first anniversary is going to be a home-made spaghetti dinner and blockbuster rental night. But at least Meme will be around to curl up on the couch with us watching the movie.
Still - we could use something good happening to us instead of the things that HAVE been happening. I've had enough of parking tickets and sick cats. So everybody concentrate on sending some good ju-ju our way, ok?
I go take nap now. Bye-bye.
4/01/2007
Counting the days
Wow...I forgot there was an outside world! Meme came home Thursday night and ever since then I've been a bundle of nerves. They kept throwing things out that I would have to look for...fever? eating? peeing? swelling? discharge? lethargy? drinking? licking stitches? jumping on furniture? And each vet I talked to - 2 different ones at the ER vets and 2 at the regular vet's office - gave me different advice on what was normal. I'm really ready for this recovery process to be done and the stitches to come out - as I know Meme is. She's really tired of the cone collar she has to wear to keep her from messing with her incision, she's tired of having to take medicine 3 times a day (no picnic for us either, believe me) and I'm fairly certain she's tired of me following her around to make sure she's eating and drinking.
On the plus side, she does seem to be feeling better. We keep her in the spare room most of the time but if we're in the living room we'll let her out to roam around provided she doesn't try to take the stairs. Once she starts showing too much interest in the stairs, we'll have to relocate to the spare room. She likes to roam and explore but her energy level's not back to normal yet. She wears herself out and spends plenty of time lying quietly or sleeping. Although she's a cat...so she did that a lot of the time anyways.
I'm sure everyone's probably tired of hearing about Meadow but frankly, she's pretty much all that I've been up to these last few days. I have a quiz tomorrow that I haven't cracked the book for yet. I'm not too concerned...we went over the material last week but I'm going to have to start reading over everything again. I also need to decide on a legal statute/concept for my final project for tomorrow night's class. Ugh. Some sleep would be nice, too. Stress, worry and guilt have insured that I'm not sleeping as much as I'd like. But we're doing better - Meme and I both. She's feeling better and I'm trying not to beat myself up as much for not insisting that we have her spayed before now.
But I'm still counting down to stitch removal day.
On the plus side, she does seem to be feeling better. We keep her in the spare room most of the time but if we're in the living room we'll let her out to roam around provided she doesn't try to take the stairs. Once she starts showing too much interest in the stairs, we'll have to relocate to the spare room. She likes to roam and explore but her energy level's not back to normal yet. She wears herself out and spends plenty of time lying quietly or sleeping. Although she's a cat...so she did that a lot of the time anyways.
I'm sure everyone's probably tired of hearing about Meadow but frankly, she's pretty much all that I've been up to these last few days. I have a quiz tomorrow that I haven't cracked the book for yet. I'm not too concerned...we went over the material last week but I'm going to have to start reading over everything again. I also need to decide on a legal statute/concept for my final project for tomorrow night's class. Ugh. Some sleep would be nice, too. Stress, worry and guilt have insured that I'm not sleeping as much as I'd like. But we're doing better - Meme and I both. She's feeling better and I'm trying not to beat myself up as much for not insisting that we have her spayed before now.
But I'm still counting down to stitch removal day.
3/29/2007
Everything that's new
Well, Meme is comfortably resting at the Higgins Animal Hospital for post-operative observation. The vet thinks she may be ready to come home tonight! She still has a fever, which they say is normal with this type of thing. It's come down a little from where it was last night. Depending on how she does today, she may be ready to come home tonight or in the morning tomorrow.
She looked pretty good this morning. She's back to her sassy self - growling and basically acting like a badass. She was so happy to see me this morning that it nearly broke my heart to have to leave her with strangers again when we got to Higgins. Everyone is really great there, though - so I'm sure she's fine. I just hope she doesn't feel like we've abandoned her.
She looked pretty good this morning. She's back to her sassy self - growling and basically acting like a badass. She was so happy to see me this morning that it nearly broke my heart to have to leave her with strangers again when we got to Higgins. Everyone is really great there, though - so I'm sure she's fine. I just hope she doesn't feel like we've abandoned her.
3/28/2007
MeMe update
Meadow is out of surgery and doing ok! The vet said that the surgery was routine and that there was no rupture in her uterus.
I am considering selling Mike to help pay for the cost of the surgery...any takers? :D
Mike is suggesting a Meme Cat benefit...how about some of those plastic containers at all of the grocery store registers? We need a color for her "benefit ribbon."
We're also switching vets. He saw her last week and I asked him about whether I should get her fixed. I was asking because when she goes into heat, Furio bites her on the neck and she almost always ends up with a bald, raw spot and it takes her weeks to grow her fur back. I asked him straight out and he said that they usually live longer if you do but that it wasn't a big deal. The vet we saw tonight said that if you don't get female cats spayed and you don't breed them then these uterus infections are very common and can be life threatening!
She could have died tonight. As Mike said, she used up at least 1 of her 9 lives. But we're so, so happy that she's doing well. When the vet called, she was already coming out from under the anesthesia. Tomorrow she'll be moved out of the ER clinic to a regular vet for a bit more observation. With luck, she'll be home in a few days and back to herself in no time!
Whew.
I am considering selling Mike to help pay for the cost of the surgery...any takers? :D
Mike is suggesting a Meme Cat benefit...how about some of those plastic containers at all of the grocery store registers? We need a color for her "benefit ribbon."
We're also switching vets. He saw her last week and I asked him about whether I should get her fixed. I was asking because when she goes into heat, Furio bites her on the neck and she almost always ends up with a bald, raw spot and it takes her weeks to grow her fur back. I asked him straight out and he said that they usually live longer if you do but that it wasn't a big deal. The vet we saw tonight said that if you don't get female cats spayed and you don't breed them then these uterus infections are very common and can be life threatening!
She could have died tonight. As Mike said, she used up at least 1 of her 9 lives. But we're so, so happy that she's doing well. When the vet called, she was already coming out from under the anesthesia. Tomorrow she'll be moved out of the ER clinic to a regular vet for a bit more observation. With luck, she'll be home in a few days and back to herself in no time!
Whew.
Meadow Cat
Meadow is at the vet ER right now, preparing for emergency surgery. She has an infected uterus which has to come out ASAP. The vet's hopeful that it's only infected and not ruptured. If it's ruptured, she'll most likely die.
We'll know more in a few hours when she has the surgery. Please keep her in your thoughts.
We'll know more in a few hours when she has the surgery. Please keep her in your thoughts.
3/27/2007
A birthday bash
Mike and I started his birthday by visiting the Museum of Contemporary Art - a museum we hadn't gotten around to seeing but which had been on Mike's "wish to see" list for some time. We got a pass from the library which got us in without paying the normal $10 fee. A fact for which I was extremely grateful. It was a fun experience going with Mike but I can definitely say...I just didn't get it. A lot of it, anyways. There were definitely some really cool things there.
But then there were things I just didn't get...like a huuuuuge room...bigger than our apartment...with white walls and a bright orange carpet. Mike and I walked across and I said, "I wonder what they use this room for." Then at the other end, we saw the wall placard. "Orange Room," it said...created by (some artist whose name I have forgotten). Or the room that had a different artist's "interpretations" of famous painter's works. Each painting had a placard that told you which famous painting the artist had recreated. Except that, to me anyway, the artist's interpretations each looked like a canvas covered in black and gray swirls. Or the photographer who took pictures of corpses in the morgue and named the pictures after their cause of death. On display at the MCA are "Knifed to death #1" and "Knifed to death #2."
Definitely the best part of the MCA was the store - which boasted a TON of cool stuff. We may go back - but probably only to the store. And only if we have money.
But then there were things I just didn't get...like a huuuuuge room...bigger than our apartment...with white walls and a bright orange carpet. Mike and I walked across and I said, "I wonder what they use this room for." Then at the other end, we saw the wall placard. "Orange Room," it said...created by (some artist whose name I have forgotten). Or the room that had a different artist's "interpretations" of famous painter's works. Each painting had a placard that told you which famous painting the artist had recreated. Except that, to me anyway, the artist's interpretations each looked like a canvas covered in black and gray swirls. Or the photographer who took pictures of corpses in the morgue and named the pictures after their cause of death. On display at the MCA are "Knifed to death #1" and "Knifed to death #2."
Definitely the best part of the MCA was the store - which boasted a TON of cool stuff. We may go back - but probably only to the store. And only if we have money.
3/26/2007
Another survey brought to you via Kelly's blog
Weirdest Dream: One night I dreamed that my mom was in my kitchen cooking hash browns and bacon. I was working on something at the table (I don't remember what) and she said, "Tell your dad he needs to mow the yard. It drives me crazy when he lets the grass get so long." That inandof itself is weird. But then the next day, my dad called and during the course of the conversation said, "I need to mow the yard. Your mom would have been on my butt by now."
Rock stars or Athletes: rock stars
Prank You Would Pull If You Had The Means: I dunno, I'll have to think about this.
Part of the Body That's Always Malfunctioning: Sinuses
Favorite Ancient Civilization: Egypt
Favorite Ninja Turtle: Michelangelo
Favorite Color: Red
Favorite Villain: Dr. Evil
Favorite Hero: Pucca
Emotional Pain or Physical: Uh...I'll pass, thanks.
Milkshakes or Ice Cream: Mlkshakes
Sunny or Rainy: Sunny
Afraid of the Dark: Ha ha....ok....sometimes.
If you could be anything, you'd be: a tree ("I know they do a lot of work with breezes")
Favorite Planet: Venus
If you were a Disney Princess, you'd be: Cinderella
Poor & Happy or Rich & Miserable: poor and happy - happy's the key for me.
Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise: Jim from "The Office"
Favorite Movie: The Princess Bride
Happily Ever After or Good Guy Gets It: Happily Ever After
Favorite Bond: Connery
Favorite Batman: Adam West
Pearl Jam or Nirvana: Yuck. Well, I hate Nirvana so I guess Pearl Jam is the lesser of two evils.
NFL or College Football: College - Go Hawkeyes!
Movie Star or Model: Movie Star
Song That's Stuck In Your Head: Me and Julio Down By the Schoolyard.
Favorite Movie Line: "Hallo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You keel my father. Prepare to die."
Song Title That Sums Up Your Life: "Everybody Gets What They Deserve" by The Churchills
Greatest QB Ever: Along the "not Joey Harrington" vein - Not Rex Grossman.
Truth or Dare: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare. (You gotta say it all sexy)
T or F: Big Girls Don't Cry: False
Cheaters or Liars: Uh...Cheaters, I suppose.
Beer or Liquor: Liquor
Guys in pink are: Not Mike.
Beer Pong or Flip Cup: What the hell is Flip Cup?
Who Would Play You In A Movie Of Your Life: Tori Spelling - she plays everybody.
Rock stars or Athletes: rock stars
Prank You Would Pull If You Had The Means: I dunno, I'll have to think about this.
Part of the Body That's Always Malfunctioning: Sinuses
Favorite Ancient Civilization: Egypt
Favorite Ninja Turtle: Michelangelo
Favorite Color: Red
Favorite Villain: Dr. Evil
Favorite Hero: Pucca
Emotional Pain or Physical: Uh...I'll pass, thanks.
Milkshakes or Ice Cream: Mlkshakes
Sunny or Rainy: Sunny
Afraid of the Dark: Ha ha....ok....sometimes.
If you could be anything, you'd be: a tree ("I know they do a lot of work with breezes")
Favorite Planet: Venus
If you were a Disney Princess, you'd be: Cinderella
Poor & Happy or Rich & Miserable: poor and happy - happy's the key for me.
Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise: Jim from "The Office"
Favorite Movie: The Princess Bride
Happily Ever After or Good Guy Gets It: Happily Ever After
Favorite Bond: Connery
Favorite Batman: Adam West
Pearl Jam or Nirvana: Yuck. Well, I hate Nirvana so I guess Pearl Jam is the lesser of two evils.
NFL or College Football: College - Go Hawkeyes!
Movie Star or Model: Movie Star
Song That's Stuck In Your Head: Me and Julio Down By the Schoolyard.
Favorite Movie Line: "Hallo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You keel my father. Prepare to die."
Song Title That Sums Up Your Life: "Everybody Gets What They Deserve" by The Churchills
Greatest QB Ever: Along the "not Joey Harrington" vein - Not Rex Grossman.
Truth or Dare: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare. (You gotta say it all sexy)
T or F: Big Girls Don't Cry: False
Cheaters or Liars: Uh...Cheaters, I suppose.
Beer or Liquor: Liquor
Guys in pink are: Not Mike.
Beer Pong or Flip Cup: What the hell is Flip Cup?
Who Would Play You In A Movie Of Your Life: Tori Spelling - she plays everybody.
3/24/2007
Sto lat!
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday, dear Mikey,
Happy birthday to you.
Sto Lat.
3/23/2007
Say goodbye
Say good-bye to Mike's 20's! We are on a 12 hour countdown now. I do enjoy when Mike's birthday arrives - if only because it stops him from "tormenting" me about being older.
Mike: How old are you again?
Me: Shutty!
Mike: No...I really want to know. How old are you now?
Me: 25.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 30.
Mike: That's not right! (He leans in and gets all up in my grill here) You're OOOOOOLDER. If you're 25, I'd be 24!
(pause)
Mike: So how old are you again?
Me: (sigh) 30.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 29.
Mike: Ha! I rule you! (Ok, I made this part up.)
But no more! In a few hours we'll be the same age and the universe will resume its axis.
Mike: How old are you again?
Me: Shutty!
Mike: No...I really want to know. How old are you now?
Me: 25.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 30.
Mike: That's not right! (He leans in and gets all up in my grill here) You're OOOOOOLDER. If you're 25, I'd be 24!
(pause)
Mike: So how old are you again?
Me: (sigh) 30.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 29.
Mike: Ha! I rule you! (Ok, I made this part up.)
But no more! In a few hours we'll be the same age and the universe will resume its axis.
3/22/2007
The things we do when we're bored
I've been a little bored this morning, so I passed time by filling out this form for my dad (and Mom...you'll find her answers in parenthesis). (Questions that require a favorite color to come as soon as he tells me what his favorite colors are)
Soooooo...without further ado, here it is.
YOUR REAL NAME
Charles (Linda)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Charizzle (Lindizzle)
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Leonard Melrose (I used a street I've lived on because my dad has never lived on a street with a name. Somehow Leonard RR #1 didn't seem appropriate)
(Eileen Garfield)
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
hachbod (haliful)
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Hreosme (Ireusek)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Jasper Libby or Forrest Almeda (Lola Carl)
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Otis (Black Chloe)
Soooooo...without further ado, here it is.
YOUR REAL NAME
Charles (Linda)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Charizzle (Lindizzle)
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Leonard Melrose (I used a street I've lived on because my dad has never lived on a street with a name. Somehow Leonard RR #1 didn't seem appropriate)
(Eileen Garfield)
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
hachbod (haliful)
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Hreosme (Ireusek)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Jasper Libby or Forrest Almeda (Lola Carl)
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Otis (Black Chloe)
non sequiturs
Well, my cold is on its way out the door. "Thank you, Cold-eeze." According to the bag, I have cut my cold time in half! How do you know that it only lasted half the time rather than the whole time, you ask? Shut up, says I, don't question the Cold-eeze!
Top Five records is going to make a "mix tape" soundtrack for Mike's upcoming 30th birthday. (If you didn't get the High Fidelity reference here...well, I'm just sad for you. :D) So far I've got "The Final Countdown" by Europe, "It's the End of the World as We Know It" by REM, "In My Next Thirty Years" by Tim McGraw and "Nineteen Somethin'" by Mark Wills. (Did you know Mark Wills has a 'Definitive Collection' cd? I only know, like, two of his songs!) Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to come up with a few more songs appropriate to go on the cd.
This morning I got a call for a "Dennis Morales" at 8 in the morning. It woke me up from a sound sleep and I told the man he had the wrong number. He said, "Are you sure?" I was like, "That my name's not DENNIS MORALES? Yeah, dude...pretty sure. There's no one here with that name and we've had this phone number for two years." He grumbled and then hung up. Afterward, I thought..."Aren't they supposed to wait until after 9AM before they can call you? I should have yelled at him."
Last night, Mike was in the room when I checked my email and got the message about the last set of tickets left out of Scott and Kelly's season package and he says, "Hey! I never got an email about this. Scott should know that I'd never hear about it from you - Mrs. Tiger Hater." I rolled my eyes and said, "You know that joke's really running thin for me. I was mad at you when I wrote that and it's really starting to piss me off now." He giggled. GIGGLED! Mike's turning into a giggler. Plus, yesterday he had an appointment at this place called "Halo" here in Chicago. It's a 'beauty salon' for men only. He had what's called 'The Man' package. It's a shampoo, hair cut, scalp massage, hand massage and parafin hand wax. The words "After my beauty appointment" actually escaped his lips! When he got home (he does look REALLY great, by the way. His hands are so smoooooooooooooth), he said, "This isn't something I'll do every month...too expensive (he had a coupon for this visit)...but maybe every other month." But when he said it, there was a wistful look in his eyes. You can tell when I graduate and start working he'll be booked in at his "man salon" every month. :D
But now, I think I'm going to go back to bed for awhile. I stayed up too late getting my reading done for class tonight. Good day, sir!
Top Five records is going to make a "mix tape" soundtrack for Mike's upcoming 30th birthday. (If you didn't get the High Fidelity reference here...well, I'm just sad for you. :D) So far I've got "The Final Countdown" by Europe, "It's the End of the World as We Know It" by REM, "In My Next Thirty Years" by Tim McGraw and "Nineteen Somethin'" by Mark Wills. (Did you know Mark Wills has a 'Definitive Collection' cd? I only know, like, two of his songs!) Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to come up with a few more songs appropriate to go on the cd.
This morning I got a call for a "Dennis Morales" at 8 in the morning. It woke me up from a sound sleep and I told the man he had the wrong number. He said, "Are you sure?" I was like, "That my name's not DENNIS MORALES? Yeah, dude...pretty sure. There's no one here with that name and we've had this phone number for two years." He grumbled and then hung up. Afterward, I thought..."Aren't they supposed to wait until after 9AM before they can call you? I should have yelled at him."
Last night, Mike was in the room when I checked my email and got the message about the last set of tickets left out of Scott and Kelly's season package and he says, "Hey! I never got an email about this. Scott should know that I'd never hear about it from you - Mrs. Tiger Hater." I rolled my eyes and said, "You know that joke's really running thin for me. I was mad at you when I wrote that and it's really starting to piss me off now." He giggled. GIGGLED! Mike's turning into a giggler. Plus, yesterday he had an appointment at this place called "Halo" here in Chicago. It's a 'beauty salon' for men only. He had what's called 'The Man' package. It's a shampoo, hair cut, scalp massage, hand massage and parafin hand wax. The words "After my beauty appointment" actually escaped his lips! When he got home (he does look REALLY great, by the way. His hands are so smoooooooooooooth), he said, "This isn't something I'll do every month...too expensive (he had a coupon for this visit)...but maybe every other month." But when he said it, there was a wistful look in his eyes. You can tell when I graduate and start working he'll be booked in at his "man salon" every month. :D
But now, I think I'm going to go back to bed for awhile. I stayed up too late getting my reading done for class tonight. Good day, sir!
3/19/2007
3/18/2007
In my next thirty years
Well, it would seem that I'm big on resolutions this year. I've been thinking a lot about the last thirty years and what I'd have done differently if I had the chance. Losing your mom and turning thirty are both natural "soul searching" occurences and i think that there should be some sort of rule that says your mom's not allowed to die six months before you turn thirty. I think I've nearly soul searched myself into a coma the last few months.
I count myself lucky because my regrets are few and I realize that even the things that I wish I could change are done and not worth rehashing ad nauseum. Having said that, there are a few changes that I'm going to be working to implement in the next thirty years. They're all basically related.
First, I'm going to grow a thicker skin. I've always been ultra-sensitive and my feelings are easily hurt. Being the brunt of a joke has never been something I've been particularly good at but I'm working on it. I'm not going to let people's remarks bother me and make me feel bad anymore. (If anyone knows how to do this, please email me.) :D
Second, I'm going to stop worrying so much about what people think of me. Mike loves me. My dad loves me. Jeff loves me. My in-laws love me (and really, what's not to love? ;)) . That's a great support system right there and I don't care what the rest of the world thinks of me!
Third, I'm going to allow myself to get angry! But I won't let it ruin my good time. Once, right after Matt died (I mean less than two weeks), I was talking to a friend of mine whose brother had just been in a car accident. She told me that she was so happy he was alive because if he'd died she didn't know if she could have gone on living. Now I was happy that her brother was alright but it seemed to me to be a rather heartless thing to say to someone who'd lost a brother two weeks before. She could have stabbed me in the chest and it would have hurt less than those words. It hurt so bad that for a moment it took my breath away. I wanted to punch her in the face and scream at her but I just retreated into myself and never said a word. To this day I have never told her how upset I was at what she'd said. I was too worried that I'd somehow make her angry with me and she "wouldn't like me anymore." So instead of speaking up and clearing the air, I bottled it inside and simmered about it for weeks. Punching her in the face would have been the wrong thing to do but I wish I'd said to her, "That remark really upset me and it's bothering me." I don't believe it was her intent to make me feel bad but because I didn't say anything, I spent weeks brooding and obsessing about her thoughtless comment until my anger consumed me. I wasn't able to have any sort of fun at all until I finally was able to let it go. It's the same sort of thing with my birthday party. There were a handful of people who had RSVP'd that they'd show up and then never did. While I still believe it's rude to not call me and tell me you wouldn't make it (I was buying food, for pete's sake) - I will politely be letting them know that I would appreciate a call next time - I refused to let it ruin my night then and I'm beyond stressing about it now. And that feels REALLY good. Before, I would have at least spent the next week wondering if this signaled that you didn't like me anymore or felt like I was boring. Now I'm just so happy to have been able to spend time with the people who could make it. By the way, though...if you weren't there... You. Missed. Out. Ha! It was awesome!
Fourth, I will not longer be a friendship lifesupport machine. Friendships come and go and I'm going to accept that. There are a few friendships that I've held onto and refused to let die a natural death. There have not been any big fights - no blow ups. Just the naturally progression of life. One of the best and the worst things about life is the way that it is always changing. Births, deaths, marriages, divorces, new jobs, new homes, moving, new friendships - they happen every day. Sometimes, despite their best intentions, people are simply too busy to devote the time necessary to keeping friendships alive. I have a hard time realizing this is the case and letting go. Sometimes when people say, "We've got to get together and do something soon!" - what they are really saying is "I like you but I am way too busy to do anything." I don't realize the difference and so I keep working to pin point a time when we can get together and am, inevitably, disappointed when they cancel at the last minute because something's come up or they simply don't respond to my email and/or phone message until it's too late to do whatever I suggested. So in my next thirty years, I'm going to remember that it's ok to let go sometimes. I'm not going to be rude to anyone or attempt to "punish" anyone. And, I'd like to specifically state that I'm not threatening to cut anybody off if they don't call me right away! I'm also not speaking to anyone in particular but rather using a general "you" to mean anyone - everyone. I'll always be here for anyone who needs me. But I'm going to let people come to me a little more. If you want to hang out or have dinner, give me a call and I will jump at the chance! If you have to cancel...no hard feelings! Call me sometime when you're available again. But I (probably) won't be calling you to reschedule. I'm going to go with the flow and let life lead me instead of trying to control every aspect of the world around me. If you don't don't have time to pal around with me - no problem. That's cool...maybe in a year or two your life will have shifted and our schedules will realign and you'll give me a call. But if not, I'll always remember the times we spent together, think of you fondly and continue to wish you well in any and everything that you do. Maybe you'll send me a postcard from wherever you're vacationing because you were in the gift shop and suddenly remembered how much I love getting postcards. Maybe we'll run into each other in the street when we're in our sixties and we'll stop to grab a drink and spend an afternoon saying, "Remember that time when we..." and sharing a few more laughs. No matter what - I'm always available for advice, a chat, a laugh or to lend a hand.
In the meantime, I feel really good about the decisions I've made. I'm working to make my life reflect the Tim McGraw song. In my next thirty years I'm going to cry a little less, laugh a little more and find a world of happiness.
I'm interested to know what you were doing when you were thirty. Or if you're not thirty yet (why are you reading this!? I try not to know people who are younger than me. :D), tell me what you think you'll be doing when you're thirty. Drop me a line - operators are standing by.
I count myself lucky because my regrets are few and I realize that even the things that I wish I could change are done and not worth rehashing ad nauseum. Having said that, there are a few changes that I'm going to be working to implement in the next thirty years. They're all basically related.
First, I'm going to grow a thicker skin. I've always been ultra-sensitive and my feelings are easily hurt. Being the brunt of a joke has never been something I've been particularly good at but I'm working on it. I'm not going to let people's remarks bother me and make me feel bad anymore. (If anyone knows how to do this, please email me.) :D
Second, I'm going to stop worrying so much about what people think of me. Mike loves me. My dad loves me. Jeff loves me. My in-laws love me (and really, what's not to love? ;)) . That's a great support system right there and I don't care what the rest of the world thinks of me!
Third, I'm going to allow myself to get angry! But I won't let it ruin my good time. Once, right after Matt died (I mean less than two weeks), I was talking to a friend of mine whose brother had just been in a car accident. She told me that she was so happy he was alive because if he'd died she didn't know if she could have gone on living. Now I was happy that her brother was alright but it seemed to me to be a rather heartless thing to say to someone who'd lost a brother two weeks before. She could have stabbed me in the chest and it would have hurt less than those words. It hurt so bad that for a moment it took my breath away. I wanted to punch her in the face and scream at her but I just retreated into myself and never said a word. To this day I have never told her how upset I was at what she'd said. I was too worried that I'd somehow make her angry with me and she "wouldn't like me anymore." So instead of speaking up and clearing the air, I bottled it inside and simmered about it for weeks. Punching her in the face would have been the wrong thing to do but I wish I'd said to her, "That remark really upset me and it's bothering me." I don't believe it was her intent to make me feel bad but because I didn't say anything, I spent weeks brooding and obsessing about her thoughtless comment until my anger consumed me. I wasn't able to have any sort of fun at all until I finally was able to let it go. It's the same sort of thing with my birthday party. There were a handful of people who had RSVP'd that they'd show up and then never did. While I still believe it's rude to not call me and tell me you wouldn't make it (I was buying food, for pete's sake) - I will politely be letting them know that I would appreciate a call next time - I refused to let it ruin my night then and I'm beyond stressing about it now. And that feels REALLY good. Before, I would have at least spent the next week wondering if this signaled that you didn't like me anymore or felt like I was boring. Now I'm just so happy to have been able to spend time with the people who could make it. By the way, though...if you weren't there... You. Missed. Out. Ha! It was awesome!
Fourth, I will not longer be a friendship lifesupport machine. Friendships come and go and I'm going to accept that. There are a few friendships that I've held onto and refused to let die a natural death. There have not been any big fights - no blow ups. Just the naturally progression of life. One of the best and the worst things about life is the way that it is always changing. Births, deaths, marriages, divorces, new jobs, new homes, moving, new friendships - they happen every day. Sometimes, despite their best intentions, people are simply too busy to devote the time necessary to keeping friendships alive. I have a hard time realizing this is the case and letting go. Sometimes when people say, "We've got to get together and do something soon!" - what they are really saying is "I like you but I am way too busy to do anything." I don't realize the difference and so I keep working to pin point a time when we can get together and am, inevitably, disappointed when they cancel at the last minute because something's come up or they simply don't respond to my email and/or phone message until it's too late to do whatever I suggested. So in my next thirty years, I'm going to remember that it's ok to let go sometimes. I'm not going to be rude to anyone or attempt to "punish" anyone. And, I'd like to specifically state that I'm not threatening to cut anybody off if they don't call me right away! I'm also not speaking to anyone in particular but rather using a general "you" to mean anyone - everyone. I'll always be here for anyone who needs me. But I'm going to let people come to me a little more. If you want to hang out or have dinner, give me a call and I will jump at the chance! If you have to cancel...no hard feelings! Call me sometime when you're available again. But I (probably) won't be calling you to reschedule. I'm going to go with the flow and let life lead me instead of trying to control every aspect of the world around me. If you don't don't have time to pal around with me - no problem. That's cool...maybe in a year or two your life will have shifted and our schedules will realign and you'll give me a call. But if not, I'll always remember the times we spent together, think of you fondly and continue to wish you well in any and everything that you do. Maybe you'll send me a postcard from wherever you're vacationing because you were in the gift shop and suddenly remembered how much I love getting postcards. Maybe we'll run into each other in the street when we're in our sixties and we'll stop to grab a drink and spend an afternoon saying, "Remember that time when we..." and sharing a few more laughs. No matter what - I'm always available for advice, a chat, a laugh or to lend a hand.
In the meantime, I feel really good about the decisions I've made. I'm working to make my life reflect the Tim McGraw song. In my next thirty years I'm going to cry a little less, laugh a little more and find a world of happiness.
I'm interested to know what you were doing when you were thirty. Or if you're not thirty yet (why are you reading this!? I try not to know people who are younger than me. :D), tell me what you think you'll be doing when you're thirty. Drop me a line - operators are standing by.
3/17/2007
3/14/2007
It never fails
Whenever we're expecting company, Mike goes into a cleaning frenzy. Usually I'm like, "What's the problem? It's clean!" With me being in school and Mike working, though, I knew the place needed some work. Last weekend we cleaned all day Saturday and got most of the place looking pretty good. The room we didn't get to? The bathroom. I said I'd do it. Actually the conversation went like this.
Cindi: How are we going to do the cleaning?
Mike: We'll divide it up and each do different rooms.
Cindi: I suppose I get the bathroom.
Mike: (pause) (sigh) I guess I can do the bathroom.
Cindi: Well, let's do the rest of the place and we can double team the bathroom.
So we cleaned the rest of the house and were too, too tired to finish the bathroom. I figured we'd get it the next day. Turns out Mike had a full schedule the next day. Anyway, the bathroom cleaning has fallen to me. Every day, as he goes out the door to work, Mike says, "Don't forget WE have to clean the bathroom this week." Right. We. Heh.
I've told that story to relate this one. I was cleaning the bathtub faucet today when I managed to turn the shower on myself. I think I'm done cleaning the bathroom for today.
Cindi: How are we going to do the cleaning?
Mike: We'll divide it up and each do different rooms.
Cindi: I suppose I get the bathroom.
Mike: (pause) (sigh) I guess I can do the bathroom.
Cindi: Well, let's do the rest of the place and we can double team the bathroom.
So we cleaned the rest of the house and were too, too tired to finish the bathroom. I figured we'd get it the next day. Turns out Mike had a full schedule the next day. Anyway, the bathroom cleaning has fallen to me. Every day, as he goes out the door to work, Mike says, "Don't forget WE have to clean the bathroom this week." Right. We. Heh.
I've told that story to relate this one. I was cleaning the bathtub faucet today when I managed to turn the shower on myself. I think I'm done cleaning the bathroom for today.
3/13/2007
I stole this from Kelly
YOUR REAL NAME
Lucinda (Cindi)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Cindizzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fav color and fav animal):
Red Weiner Dog
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Lee Denise
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
kurlupar
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
purple daquiri
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Ureaojn
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Ruby Swede or Nola Clyde
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Meadow
Lucinda (Cindi)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Cindizzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fav color and fav animal):
Red Weiner Dog
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Lee Denise
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
kurlupar
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
purple daquiri
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Ureaojn
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Ruby Swede or Nola Clyde
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Meadow
3/09/2007
Download this song!
Ok, I adore this song. I hear it on the radio every so often and Mike sings it to me in the car sometimes. It's just a sort of silly song that makes me laugh and I love, love, love it when Mike sings it to me. I'm posting it because I finally broke down and bought it from I-tunes. Ah, yes.
She is My Everything - John Prine
She is my everything
From her suntanned shoulders
Down to the freckles
On her wedding ring
Her feet are so warm
They could melt the snow
In the early Spring
She is my everything
She goes everywhere
from Copenhagen
To making eggs and bacon
down in Jackson Square
I'd like to drive a Cadillac
The color of her long black hair
She goes everywhere
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She uses Ever-ready
batteries to keep
Her electrical appliances
a-going steady
She can do fourteen things at once
And then her phone'll ring
She is my everything
She knows everybody
From Muhammad Ali
To teaching Bruce Lee
How to do karate
She can lead a parade
While putting on her shades
In her Masarati
She knows everybody
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She is my everything
When she wakes up in the morning
That's when the birdies
Start to sing
When I hear her voice
I'll tell you boys
I forget everything
She is my everything
She is my everything
She is My Everything - John Prine
She is my everything
From her suntanned shoulders
Down to the freckles
On her wedding ring
Her feet are so warm
They could melt the snow
In the early Spring
She is my everything
She goes everywhere
from Copenhagen
To making eggs and bacon
down in Jackson Square
I'd like to drive a Cadillac
The color of her long black hair
She goes everywhere
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She uses Ever-ready
batteries to keep
Her electrical appliances
a-going steady
She can do fourteen things at once
And then her phone'll ring
She is my everything
She knows everybody
From Muhammad Ali
To teaching Bruce Lee
How to do karate
She can lead a parade
While putting on her shades
In her Masarati
She knows everybody
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She is my everything
When she wakes up in the morning
That's when the birdies
Start to sing
When I hear her voice
I'll tell you boys
I forget everything
She is my everything
She is my everything
3/08/2007
I quit the blog again
But I only quit for a few days this time. Every time I'd start to write something before all I would be able to talk about is how much I hate people and wish they'd all drop off the face of the earth. This has been for a few reasons.
1. Finals - hate 'em
2. Stupid birthday party - big mess now. Wish I'd never had the idea sometimes. Mike can't decide what we should do at the party...he only knows that he hates any ideas I've come up with. He shoots them down and then will ask me the next day, "So what are we going to do/eat at the party?" Small prospective turn out at first made me feel undervalued - have decided to make this a positive...will save money!
3. Feel unappreciated. No reason...general ugly depression has descended and left me with "Nobody loves me" feelings.
4. Have lost cell phone in house. I had it when I came home Tuesday night but the battery was almost dead. Didn't notice where I set it down and now it's dead and I can't call it to figure out where it is. It's in a coat pocket or a bag or under a stack of school papers somewhere. Stupid cell phones. I had it with me on the way home because I had called Mike to let him know where I was - I just was distracted and didn't watch where I put it. On the positive side, I pulled out my old one and it looks like it will work if I buy new battery for it. So if worse comes to worse, I'm still ok.
5. Writing teacher gave me a lower grade on my case brief saying my legal issue "needed revision" even though it was the right issue - she didn't like the way I worded it...which was straight out of the case, by the way. But then she gave another student (who had an extra wrong issue) an A. How is it an A if you have a wrong issue but not when you have the right one? This is reason I didn't watch where I set down cell phone - I was so mad about this that I was foaming at the mouth.
6. Don't know what to get Mike for birthday. Don't have any money of own to do this and feel awkward buying gift for him with his own money. Yes, I know it's "our" money but he's earning all of it right now.
7. Stupid birthday - don't want to have birthday without Mom. This is the crux of entire depression.
But then today, I was doing some stuff around the house with the satellite radio playing on the tv. I flipped to Hair Nation just in time to hear "Final Countdown" beginning. This restored some of my good humor as it has become a bit of a joke between Mike and I. I was talking about my birthday, the party and turning thirty and he started to sing/hum the beginning to "Final Countdown." Then every time I would think about what/when/where to have the party, I would realize after a few minutes that I was hearing the song in my head. I finally gave in and downloaded it from Itunes.
Ok - good mood's over. Fair warning - I am thoroughly unpleasant at this point in time. I strive to be in a better mood when Andrea, Bob and Kristie arrive but until then I make no promises.
1. Finals - hate 'em
2. Stupid birthday party - big mess now. Wish I'd never had the idea sometimes. Mike can't decide what we should do at the party...he only knows that he hates any ideas I've come up with. He shoots them down and then will ask me the next day, "So what are we going to do/eat at the party?" Small prospective turn out at first made me feel undervalued - have decided to make this a positive...will save money!
3. Feel unappreciated. No reason...general ugly depression has descended and left me with "Nobody loves me" feelings.
4. Have lost cell phone in house. I had it when I came home Tuesday night but the battery was almost dead. Didn't notice where I set it down and now it's dead and I can't call it to figure out where it is. It's in a coat pocket or a bag or under a stack of school papers somewhere. Stupid cell phones. I had it with me on the way home because I had called Mike to let him know where I was - I just was distracted and didn't watch where I put it. On the positive side, I pulled out my old one and it looks like it will work if I buy new battery for it. So if worse comes to worse, I'm still ok.
5. Writing teacher gave me a lower grade on my case brief saying my legal issue "needed revision" even though it was the right issue - she didn't like the way I worded it...which was straight out of the case, by the way. But then she gave another student (who had an extra wrong issue) an A. How is it an A if you have a wrong issue but not when you have the right one? This is reason I didn't watch where I set down cell phone - I was so mad about this that I was foaming at the mouth.
6. Don't know what to get Mike for birthday. Don't have any money of own to do this and feel awkward buying gift for him with his own money. Yes, I know it's "our" money but he's earning all of it right now.
7. Stupid birthday - don't want to have birthday without Mom. This is the crux of entire depression.
But then today, I was doing some stuff around the house with the satellite radio playing on the tv. I flipped to Hair Nation just in time to hear "Final Countdown" beginning. This restored some of my good humor as it has become a bit of a joke between Mike and I. I was talking about my birthday, the party and turning thirty and he started to sing/hum the beginning to "Final Countdown." Then every time I would think about what/when/where to have the party, I would realize after a few minutes that I was hearing the song in my head. I finally gave in and downloaded it from Itunes.
Ok - good mood's over. Fair warning - I am thoroughly unpleasant at this point in time. I strive to be in a better mood when Andrea, Bob and Kristie arrive but until then I make no promises.
3/02/2007
The thrift store book or More than I bargained for...
We're going to Michigan tonight. I had forgotten to go to the library earlier in the week to get a couple of books for the ride and I was thinking about whether or not I had the ambition to get up and head that way before Mike gets home. I don't, by the way. Then I remembered that the other day, Mike dropped me off at the thrift store and said I should get a couple of cheap books. I proceeded to get about 20...hey, they were 25 and 50 cents! Get off my back! Anyway, I've read most of them but as I sat here thinking about going to the library, I realized that I'd set aside a couple of the books and hadn't even touched them yet. I picked them up to see if they were acceptable and saw that I'd bought Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh even though I'd once read it years ago. I can never resist buying a book I've read before (and liked) from a thrift store. I re-read books over and over - so 25 cents is a small investment to pay for the enjoyment I'll get from them. I'd read this book before - years and years before. In fact, right now I don't even really remember much about it at all. That's how long ago it's been.
I picked it up and looked at it. I turned it over and looked at the reviews on the back of the book jacket. Then I tossed it down onto table and turned to get a bottle of water from the fridge. When I turned around, I saw that it had landed and opened. On the blank page at the front was a handwritten note.
6-12-87
Dear Kristin
At your age, you probably will wonder why I gave you this book.
At 20, you will think it an interesting collection of thoughts written by an old woman.
But at 30, and every year after you will find this book has not only found a place in your heart, but the truth it contains will have a place in your life.
Enjoy - many times,
Dareen Barlow
I made a cup of hot tea, held the book and thought about it while I sipped. I'm fascinated. Who is Kristin? Who is Dareen Barlow? Why is she giving Kristin this book? How old was Kristin when she got the book? How old is she now? Why doesn't she still have it? Did something happen to her? Did she give up on understanding the metaphor? Did she become disillusioned with life and get rid of all of the leftover trinkets from her childhood? What disillusioned her? Was it a man? It had to be a man - it's always a man. Was it unrequited love? Was it a divorce? Did he leave her for the nanny? Why is it always the nanny?! Or her sister! Oh, my God...he left her for her sister and now the whole family's torn apart. What did she do then? Did she go back to school and make a better life for herself or did she fall into a deep depression and resort to plastic surgery to fix her perceived flaws which she feels drove her husband to prefer her sister? Or did she take up with a much younger man and move to St. Martinque? With the millions of dollars that she got from her husband when she and her lawyer gouged him in the divorce settlement. Ha ha! Adultery's a bitch - serves you right, you jerk!
I suddenly realized I'd spent an hour and a half thinking about this and inventing scenarios, each more outrageous than the last. Who needs a book for entertainment?! Not me.
I picked it up and looked at it. I turned it over and looked at the reviews on the back of the book jacket. Then I tossed it down onto table and turned to get a bottle of water from the fridge. When I turned around, I saw that it had landed and opened. On the blank page at the front was a handwritten note.
6-12-87
Dear Kristin
At your age, you probably will wonder why I gave you this book.
At 20, you will think it an interesting collection of thoughts written by an old woman.
But at 30, and every year after you will find this book has not only found a place in your heart, but the truth it contains will have a place in your life.
Enjoy - many times,
Dareen Barlow
I made a cup of hot tea, held the book and thought about it while I sipped. I'm fascinated. Who is Kristin? Who is Dareen Barlow? Why is she giving Kristin this book? How old was Kristin when she got the book? How old is she now? Why doesn't she still have it? Did something happen to her? Did she give up on understanding the metaphor? Did she become disillusioned with life and get rid of all of the leftover trinkets from her childhood? What disillusioned her? Was it a man? It had to be a man - it's always a man. Was it unrequited love? Was it a divorce? Did he leave her for the nanny? Why is it always the nanny?! Or her sister! Oh, my God...he left her for her sister and now the whole family's torn apart. What did she do then? Did she go back to school and make a better life for herself or did she fall into a deep depression and resort to plastic surgery to fix her perceived flaws which she feels drove her husband to prefer her sister? Or did she take up with a much younger man and move to St. Martinque? With the millions of dollars that she got from her husband when she and her lawyer gouged him in the divorce settlement. Ha ha! Adultery's a bitch - serves you right, you jerk!
I suddenly realized I'd spent an hour and a half thinking about this and inventing scenarios, each more outrageous than the last. Who needs a book for entertainment?! Not me.
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