Happy Birthday, Matt!

Today, December 16, would have been my baby brother Matt's 27th birthday. He died in 2003 at the age of 22 after a relatively short illness and we miss him dreadfully. In honor of Matt's birthday, I would like to tell a few stories and Matt-facts.

Matt comes home from the hospital, December 1980
Jeff was 10, I was 3, Mom was 31.

Bringing Matt home from the hospital is my first clear memory. I was quite upset because I wanted a little sister. I picked out the names for the new baby. Matthew for a boy, Mary for a girl. I was disappointed that he was a boy that I asked my mom if we could name him Mary anyway.

Matt at age 9 months
September, 1981

Matt was always such a funny kid - unintentionally. We had a big above ground pool in our backyard with metal steps and every once in awhile, the bolts would rust through and the step would fall off and my dad would have to repair the ladder so we could get in and out of the pool. One summer day, my mom, Matt and I had been swimming. My mom got out and stood there to help he and me exit the pool. I got out fine, but when Matt stepped onto the ladder, the step broke and he fell back into the pool. He was fine, but very upset because everybody was out of the pool except for him. He started to cry and Mom said, "Don't worry, Matty. I'm sending Cindi to get your dad and he'll help you." Matt sniffled and said, "Great...I'll be stuck in the big pool for life."

Matt and Grandpa Parker - Dec. 16, 1981

Matt always claimed to be our Mom's favorite. She'd always say, "Matthew, I don't have a favorite." and he'd just smile and say, "Just remember, Mom. When Jeff and Cindi are fighting over whether or not you go to the home, I'm the deciding vote!"

Matt - Christmas, 1981

My mom once convinced Matt that our beagle, Ralph, could answer him if he asked him yes or no questions. She held Ralph on her lap with her hand on the back of his neck and when Mike would ask a yes or no question, she'd move the dog's head up and down or left to right. After she let the dog down, Matt followed it all over the house - unable to figure out why Ralph was now ignoring him.

Matt in his rocking chair - date unknown

Once Matt and I were playing baseball in the front yard. I was up to bat and Matt was pitching. I hit a line drive right into his face and gave him the biggest, baddest shiner you've ever seen. Matt told all of the kids on the bus that I held him down and beat the crap out of him.

Cindi and Matt - early 1980's

Matt was always really close to my Granny. When she got too unsteady on her feet to bring her laundry from her house to ours and back again, Matt would pick it up, do it for her and take it back. Once when he was 17, he gave up his Saturday to take Granny to the family reunion and sat with her the entire time in case she needed anything. The last day she was on earth, Matt was so angry because they'd given up and told us that she was going to die. We asked him if he wanted to come to the hospital with us to sit with her and he said, "I'm not going. They're just going to let her die." Jeff finally talked him into coming to say good-bye. He sat with her for awhile and then retreated to the corner where he sat with his eyes leaking tears. It was probably the hardest thing he had ever done - but he did it.

Matt and Granny - Christmas, 198?

When Granny died, he played Amazing Grace at her funeral - solo, on his electric guitar. When he finished, I don't know of anyone who hadn't shed tears - it was the saddest, sweetest sound I have ever heard.

Matt, kindergarten picture - 1986

He was always so ornery - but funny at the same time! Once he called me when I was in graduate school and said I should call Mom because she was really upset. She had gone to clean the cage and found our hamster, Yoko, dead, he said, and was very emotional about it. I was a little surprised - because I had thought Mom hated that hamster, but naturally I was really concerned for my mom's feelings. I said something like, "Oh, poor mom." That little stinker had me really worried before he said, "Yeah. Mom said...and I quote, 'I hated that bitch and she hated me. She bit me every chance she got!'" Then he just laughed and laughed when I yelled at him for freaking me out.

My cousin, Kreg, my mom and Matty

My mom said that as a baby, Matt was a grunter. She said that when you held him, you were always worried that you were squeezing him too tight.

Our family - July 30, 1996

When Matt started having heart palpitations in May of 2003, he suspected his time on earth was nearing its end. He wrote us each a letter and left them in his desk - in case he died. He told us that he loved us and not to worry about him because he was with Granny and that she would take care of him.

I got this sonnet in my email the day after Matt died.

For Matt.
12/16/1980 - 06/24/2003.
Forever in our hearts.