Well, Meme is comfortably resting at the Higgins Animal Hospital for post-operative observation. The vet thinks she may be ready to come home tonight! She still has a fever, which they say is normal with this type of thing. It's come down a little from where it was last night. Depending on how she does today, she may be ready to come home tonight or in the morning tomorrow.
She looked pretty good this morning. She's back to her sassy self - growling and basically acting like a badass. She was so happy to see me this morning that it nearly broke my heart to have to leave her with strangers again when we got to Higgins. Everyone is really great there, though - so I'm sure she's fine. I just hope she doesn't feel like we've abandoned her.
3/29/2007
3/28/2007
MeMe update
Meadow is out of surgery and doing ok! The vet said that the surgery was routine and that there was no rupture in her uterus.
I am considering selling Mike to help pay for the cost of the surgery...any takers? :D
Mike is suggesting a Meme Cat benefit...how about some of those plastic containers at all of the grocery store registers? We need a color for her "benefit ribbon."
We're also switching vets. He saw her last week and I asked him about whether I should get her fixed. I was asking because when she goes into heat, Furio bites her on the neck and she almost always ends up with a bald, raw spot and it takes her weeks to grow her fur back. I asked him straight out and he said that they usually live longer if you do but that it wasn't a big deal. The vet we saw tonight said that if you don't get female cats spayed and you don't breed them then these uterus infections are very common and can be life threatening!
She could have died tonight. As Mike said, she used up at least 1 of her 9 lives. But we're so, so happy that she's doing well. When the vet called, she was already coming out from under the anesthesia. Tomorrow she'll be moved out of the ER clinic to a regular vet for a bit more observation. With luck, she'll be home in a few days and back to herself in no time!
Whew.
I am considering selling Mike to help pay for the cost of the surgery...any takers? :D
Mike is suggesting a Meme Cat benefit...how about some of those plastic containers at all of the grocery store registers? We need a color for her "benefit ribbon."
We're also switching vets. He saw her last week and I asked him about whether I should get her fixed. I was asking because when she goes into heat, Furio bites her on the neck and she almost always ends up with a bald, raw spot and it takes her weeks to grow her fur back. I asked him straight out and he said that they usually live longer if you do but that it wasn't a big deal. The vet we saw tonight said that if you don't get female cats spayed and you don't breed them then these uterus infections are very common and can be life threatening!
She could have died tonight. As Mike said, she used up at least 1 of her 9 lives. But we're so, so happy that she's doing well. When the vet called, she was already coming out from under the anesthesia. Tomorrow she'll be moved out of the ER clinic to a regular vet for a bit more observation. With luck, she'll be home in a few days and back to herself in no time!
Whew.
Meadow Cat
Meadow is at the vet ER right now, preparing for emergency surgery. She has an infected uterus which has to come out ASAP. The vet's hopeful that it's only infected and not ruptured. If it's ruptured, she'll most likely die.
We'll know more in a few hours when she has the surgery. Please keep her in your thoughts.
We'll know more in a few hours when she has the surgery. Please keep her in your thoughts.
3/27/2007
A birthday bash
Mike and I started his birthday by visiting the Museum of Contemporary Art - a museum we hadn't gotten around to seeing but which had been on Mike's "wish to see" list for some time. We got a pass from the library which got us in without paying the normal $10 fee. A fact for which I was extremely grateful. It was a fun experience going with Mike but I can definitely say...I just didn't get it. A lot of it, anyways. There were definitely some really cool things there.
But then there were things I just didn't get...like a huuuuuge room...bigger than our apartment...with white walls and a bright orange carpet. Mike and I walked across and I said, "I wonder what they use this room for." Then at the other end, we saw the wall placard. "Orange Room," it said...created by (some artist whose name I have forgotten). Or the room that had a different artist's "interpretations" of famous painter's works. Each painting had a placard that told you which famous painting the artist had recreated. Except that, to me anyway, the artist's interpretations each looked like a canvas covered in black and gray swirls. Or the photographer who took pictures of corpses in the morgue and named the pictures after their cause of death. On display at the MCA are "Knifed to death #1" and "Knifed to death #2."
Definitely the best part of the MCA was the store - which boasted a TON of cool stuff. We may go back - but probably only to the store. And only if we have money.
But then there were things I just didn't get...like a huuuuuge room...bigger than our apartment...with white walls and a bright orange carpet. Mike and I walked across and I said, "I wonder what they use this room for." Then at the other end, we saw the wall placard. "Orange Room," it said...created by (some artist whose name I have forgotten). Or the room that had a different artist's "interpretations" of famous painter's works. Each painting had a placard that told you which famous painting the artist had recreated. Except that, to me anyway, the artist's interpretations each looked like a canvas covered in black and gray swirls. Or the photographer who took pictures of corpses in the morgue and named the pictures after their cause of death. On display at the MCA are "Knifed to death #1" and "Knifed to death #2."
Definitely the best part of the MCA was the store - which boasted a TON of cool stuff. We may go back - but probably only to the store. And only if we have money.
3/26/2007
Another survey brought to you via Kelly's blog
Weirdest Dream: One night I dreamed that my mom was in my kitchen cooking hash browns and bacon. I was working on something at the table (I don't remember what) and she said, "Tell your dad he needs to mow the yard. It drives me crazy when he lets the grass get so long." That inandof itself is weird. But then the next day, my dad called and during the course of the conversation said, "I need to mow the yard. Your mom would have been on my butt by now."
Rock stars or Athletes: rock stars
Prank You Would Pull If You Had The Means: I dunno, I'll have to think about this.
Part of the Body That's Always Malfunctioning: Sinuses
Favorite Ancient Civilization: Egypt
Favorite Ninja Turtle: Michelangelo
Favorite Color: Red
Favorite Villain: Dr. Evil
Favorite Hero: Pucca
Emotional Pain or Physical: Uh...I'll pass, thanks.
Milkshakes or Ice Cream: Mlkshakes
Sunny or Rainy: Sunny
Afraid of the Dark: Ha ha....ok....sometimes.
If you could be anything, you'd be: a tree ("I know they do a lot of work with breezes")
Favorite Planet: Venus
If you were a Disney Princess, you'd be: Cinderella
Poor & Happy or Rich & Miserable: poor and happy - happy's the key for me.
Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise: Jim from "The Office"
Favorite Movie: The Princess Bride
Happily Ever After or Good Guy Gets It: Happily Ever After
Favorite Bond: Connery
Favorite Batman: Adam West
Pearl Jam or Nirvana: Yuck. Well, I hate Nirvana so I guess Pearl Jam is the lesser of two evils.
NFL or College Football: College - Go Hawkeyes!
Movie Star or Model: Movie Star
Song That's Stuck In Your Head: Me and Julio Down By the Schoolyard.
Favorite Movie Line: "Hallo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You keel my father. Prepare to die."
Song Title That Sums Up Your Life: "Everybody Gets What They Deserve" by The Churchills
Greatest QB Ever: Along the "not Joey Harrington" vein - Not Rex Grossman.
Truth or Dare: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare. (You gotta say it all sexy)
T or F: Big Girls Don't Cry: False
Cheaters or Liars: Uh...Cheaters, I suppose.
Beer or Liquor: Liquor
Guys in pink are: Not Mike.
Beer Pong or Flip Cup: What the hell is Flip Cup?
Who Would Play You In A Movie Of Your Life: Tori Spelling - she plays everybody.
Rock stars or Athletes: rock stars
Prank You Would Pull If You Had The Means: I dunno, I'll have to think about this.
Part of the Body That's Always Malfunctioning: Sinuses
Favorite Ancient Civilization: Egypt
Favorite Ninja Turtle: Michelangelo
Favorite Color: Red
Favorite Villain: Dr. Evil
Favorite Hero: Pucca
Emotional Pain or Physical: Uh...I'll pass, thanks.
Milkshakes or Ice Cream: Mlkshakes
Sunny or Rainy: Sunny
Afraid of the Dark: Ha ha....ok....sometimes.
If you could be anything, you'd be: a tree ("I know they do a lot of work with breezes")
Favorite Planet: Venus
If you were a Disney Princess, you'd be: Cinderella
Poor & Happy or Rich & Miserable: poor and happy - happy's the key for me.
Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise: Jim from "The Office"
Favorite Movie: The Princess Bride
Happily Ever After or Good Guy Gets It: Happily Ever After
Favorite Bond: Connery
Favorite Batman: Adam West
Pearl Jam or Nirvana: Yuck. Well, I hate Nirvana so I guess Pearl Jam is the lesser of two evils.
NFL or College Football: College - Go Hawkeyes!
Movie Star or Model: Movie Star
Song That's Stuck In Your Head: Me and Julio Down By the Schoolyard.
Favorite Movie Line: "Hallo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You keel my father. Prepare to die."
Song Title That Sums Up Your Life: "Everybody Gets What They Deserve" by The Churchills
Greatest QB Ever: Along the "not Joey Harrington" vein - Not Rex Grossman.
Truth or Dare: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare. (You gotta say it all sexy)
T or F: Big Girls Don't Cry: False
Cheaters or Liars: Uh...Cheaters, I suppose.
Beer or Liquor: Liquor
Guys in pink are: Not Mike.
Beer Pong or Flip Cup: What the hell is Flip Cup?
Who Would Play You In A Movie Of Your Life: Tori Spelling - she plays everybody.
3/24/2007
Sto lat!
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday, dear Mikey,
Happy birthday to you.
Sto Lat.
3/23/2007
Say goodbye
Say good-bye to Mike's 20's! We are on a 12 hour countdown now. I do enjoy when Mike's birthday arrives - if only because it stops him from "tormenting" me about being older.
Mike: How old are you again?
Me: Shutty!
Mike: No...I really want to know. How old are you now?
Me: 25.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 30.
Mike: That's not right! (He leans in and gets all up in my grill here) You're OOOOOOLDER. If you're 25, I'd be 24!
(pause)
Mike: So how old are you again?
Me: (sigh) 30.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 29.
Mike: Ha! I rule you! (Ok, I made this part up.)
But no more! In a few hours we'll be the same age and the universe will resume its axis.
Mike: How old are you again?
Me: Shutty!
Mike: No...I really want to know. How old are you now?
Me: 25.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 30.
Mike: That's not right! (He leans in and gets all up in my grill here) You're OOOOOOLDER. If you're 25, I'd be 24!
(pause)
Mike: So how old are you again?
Me: (sigh) 30.
Mike: And how old am I?
Me: 29.
Mike: Ha! I rule you! (Ok, I made this part up.)
But no more! In a few hours we'll be the same age and the universe will resume its axis.
3/22/2007
The things we do when we're bored
I've been a little bored this morning, so I passed time by filling out this form for my dad (and Mom...you'll find her answers in parenthesis). (Questions that require a favorite color to come as soon as he tells me what his favorite colors are)
Soooooo...without further ado, here it is.
YOUR REAL NAME
Charles (Linda)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Charizzle (Lindizzle)
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Leonard Melrose (I used a street I've lived on because my dad has never lived on a street with a name. Somehow Leonard RR #1 didn't seem appropriate)
(Eileen Garfield)
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
hachbod (haliful)
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Hreosme (Ireusek)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Jasper Libby or Forrest Almeda (Lola Carl)
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Otis (Black Chloe)
Soooooo...without further ado, here it is.
YOUR REAL NAME
Charles (Linda)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Charizzle (Lindizzle)
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Leonard Melrose (I used a street I've lived on because my dad has never lived on a street with a name. Somehow Leonard RR #1 didn't seem appropriate)
(Eileen Garfield)
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
hachbod (haliful)
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Hreosme (Ireusek)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Jasper Libby or Forrest Almeda (Lola Carl)
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Otis (Black Chloe)
non sequiturs
Well, my cold is on its way out the door. "Thank you, Cold-eeze." According to the bag, I have cut my cold time in half! How do you know that it only lasted half the time rather than the whole time, you ask? Shut up, says I, don't question the Cold-eeze!
Top Five records is going to make a "mix tape" soundtrack for Mike's upcoming 30th birthday. (If you didn't get the High Fidelity reference here...well, I'm just sad for you. :D) So far I've got "The Final Countdown" by Europe, "It's the End of the World as We Know It" by REM, "In My Next Thirty Years" by Tim McGraw and "Nineteen Somethin'" by Mark Wills. (Did you know Mark Wills has a 'Definitive Collection' cd? I only know, like, two of his songs!) Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to come up with a few more songs appropriate to go on the cd.
This morning I got a call for a "Dennis Morales" at 8 in the morning. It woke me up from a sound sleep and I told the man he had the wrong number. He said, "Are you sure?" I was like, "That my name's not DENNIS MORALES? Yeah, dude...pretty sure. There's no one here with that name and we've had this phone number for two years." He grumbled and then hung up. Afterward, I thought..."Aren't they supposed to wait until after 9AM before they can call you? I should have yelled at him."
Last night, Mike was in the room when I checked my email and got the message about the last set of tickets left out of Scott and Kelly's season package and he says, "Hey! I never got an email about this. Scott should know that I'd never hear about it from you - Mrs. Tiger Hater." I rolled my eyes and said, "You know that joke's really running thin for me. I was mad at you when I wrote that and it's really starting to piss me off now." He giggled. GIGGLED! Mike's turning into a giggler. Plus, yesterday he had an appointment at this place called "Halo" here in Chicago. It's a 'beauty salon' for men only. He had what's called 'The Man' package. It's a shampoo, hair cut, scalp massage, hand massage and parafin hand wax. The words "After my beauty appointment" actually escaped his lips! When he got home (he does look REALLY great, by the way. His hands are so smoooooooooooooth), he said, "This isn't something I'll do every month...too expensive (he had a coupon for this visit)...but maybe every other month." But when he said it, there was a wistful look in his eyes. You can tell when I graduate and start working he'll be booked in at his "man salon" every month. :D
But now, I think I'm going to go back to bed for awhile. I stayed up too late getting my reading done for class tonight. Good day, sir!
Top Five records is going to make a "mix tape" soundtrack for Mike's upcoming 30th birthday. (If you didn't get the High Fidelity reference here...well, I'm just sad for you. :D) So far I've got "The Final Countdown" by Europe, "It's the End of the World as We Know It" by REM, "In My Next Thirty Years" by Tim McGraw and "Nineteen Somethin'" by Mark Wills. (Did you know Mark Wills has a 'Definitive Collection' cd? I only know, like, two of his songs!) Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to come up with a few more songs appropriate to go on the cd.
This morning I got a call for a "Dennis Morales" at 8 in the morning. It woke me up from a sound sleep and I told the man he had the wrong number. He said, "Are you sure?" I was like, "That my name's not DENNIS MORALES? Yeah, dude...pretty sure. There's no one here with that name and we've had this phone number for two years." He grumbled and then hung up. Afterward, I thought..."Aren't they supposed to wait until after 9AM before they can call you? I should have yelled at him."
Last night, Mike was in the room when I checked my email and got the message about the last set of tickets left out of Scott and Kelly's season package and he says, "Hey! I never got an email about this. Scott should know that I'd never hear about it from you - Mrs. Tiger Hater." I rolled my eyes and said, "You know that joke's really running thin for me. I was mad at you when I wrote that and it's really starting to piss me off now." He giggled. GIGGLED! Mike's turning into a giggler. Plus, yesterday he had an appointment at this place called "Halo" here in Chicago. It's a 'beauty salon' for men only. He had what's called 'The Man' package. It's a shampoo, hair cut, scalp massage, hand massage and parafin hand wax. The words "After my beauty appointment" actually escaped his lips! When he got home (he does look REALLY great, by the way. His hands are so smoooooooooooooth), he said, "This isn't something I'll do every month...too expensive (he had a coupon for this visit)...but maybe every other month." But when he said it, there was a wistful look in his eyes. You can tell when I graduate and start working he'll be booked in at his "man salon" every month. :D
But now, I think I'm going to go back to bed for awhile. I stayed up too late getting my reading done for class tonight. Good day, sir!
3/19/2007
3/18/2007
In my next thirty years
Well, it would seem that I'm big on resolutions this year. I've been thinking a lot about the last thirty years and what I'd have done differently if I had the chance. Losing your mom and turning thirty are both natural "soul searching" occurences and i think that there should be some sort of rule that says your mom's not allowed to die six months before you turn thirty. I think I've nearly soul searched myself into a coma the last few months.
I count myself lucky because my regrets are few and I realize that even the things that I wish I could change are done and not worth rehashing ad nauseum. Having said that, there are a few changes that I'm going to be working to implement in the next thirty years. They're all basically related.
First, I'm going to grow a thicker skin. I've always been ultra-sensitive and my feelings are easily hurt. Being the brunt of a joke has never been something I've been particularly good at but I'm working on it. I'm not going to let people's remarks bother me and make me feel bad anymore. (If anyone knows how to do this, please email me.) :D
Second, I'm going to stop worrying so much about what people think of me. Mike loves me. My dad loves me. Jeff loves me. My in-laws love me (and really, what's not to love? ;)) . That's a great support system right there and I don't care what the rest of the world thinks of me!
Third, I'm going to allow myself to get angry! But I won't let it ruin my good time. Once, right after Matt died (I mean less than two weeks), I was talking to a friend of mine whose brother had just been in a car accident. She told me that she was so happy he was alive because if he'd died she didn't know if she could have gone on living. Now I was happy that her brother was alright but it seemed to me to be a rather heartless thing to say to someone who'd lost a brother two weeks before. She could have stabbed me in the chest and it would have hurt less than those words. It hurt so bad that for a moment it took my breath away. I wanted to punch her in the face and scream at her but I just retreated into myself and never said a word. To this day I have never told her how upset I was at what she'd said. I was too worried that I'd somehow make her angry with me and she "wouldn't like me anymore." So instead of speaking up and clearing the air, I bottled it inside and simmered about it for weeks. Punching her in the face would have been the wrong thing to do but I wish I'd said to her, "That remark really upset me and it's bothering me." I don't believe it was her intent to make me feel bad but because I didn't say anything, I spent weeks brooding and obsessing about her thoughtless comment until my anger consumed me. I wasn't able to have any sort of fun at all until I finally was able to let it go. It's the same sort of thing with my birthday party. There were a handful of people who had RSVP'd that they'd show up and then never did. While I still believe it's rude to not call me and tell me you wouldn't make it (I was buying food, for pete's sake) - I will politely be letting them know that I would appreciate a call next time - I refused to let it ruin my night then and I'm beyond stressing about it now. And that feels REALLY good. Before, I would have at least spent the next week wondering if this signaled that you didn't like me anymore or felt like I was boring. Now I'm just so happy to have been able to spend time with the people who could make it. By the way, though...if you weren't there... You. Missed. Out. Ha! It was awesome!
Fourth, I will not longer be a friendship lifesupport machine. Friendships come and go and I'm going to accept that. There are a few friendships that I've held onto and refused to let die a natural death. There have not been any big fights - no blow ups. Just the naturally progression of life. One of the best and the worst things about life is the way that it is always changing. Births, deaths, marriages, divorces, new jobs, new homes, moving, new friendships - they happen every day. Sometimes, despite their best intentions, people are simply too busy to devote the time necessary to keeping friendships alive. I have a hard time realizing this is the case and letting go. Sometimes when people say, "We've got to get together and do something soon!" - what they are really saying is "I like you but I am way too busy to do anything." I don't realize the difference and so I keep working to pin point a time when we can get together and am, inevitably, disappointed when they cancel at the last minute because something's come up or they simply don't respond to my email and/or phone message until it's too late to do whatever I suggested. So in my next thirty years, I'm going to remember that it's ok to let go sometimes. I'm not going to be rude to anyone or attempt to "punish" anyone. And, I'd like to specifically state that I'm not threatening to cut anybody off if they don't call me right away! I'm also not speaking to anyone in particular but rather using a general "you" to mean anyone - everyone. I'll always be here for anyone who needs me. But I'm going to let people come to me a little more. If you want to hang out or have dinner, give me a call and I will jump at the chance! If you have to cancel...no hard feelings! Call me sometime when you're available again. But I (probably) won't be calling you to reschedule. I'm going to go with the flow and let life lead me instead of trying to control every aspect of the world around me. If you don't don't have time to pal around with me - no problem. That's cool...maybe in a year or two your life will have shifted and our schedules will realign and you'll give me a call. But if not, I'll always remember the times we spent together, think of you fondly and continue to wish you well in any and everything that you do. Maybe you'll send me a postcard from wherever you're vacationing because you were in the gift shop and suddenly remembered how much I love getting postcards. Maybe we'll run into each other in the street when we're in our sixties and we'll stop to grab a drink and spend an afternoon saying, "Remember that time when we..." and sharing a few more laughs. No matter what - I'm always available for advice, a chat, a laugh or to lend a hand.
In the meantime, I feel really good about the decisions I've made. I'm working to make my life reflect the Tim McGraw song. In my next thirty years I'm going to cry a little less, laugh a little more and find a world of happiness.
I'm interested to know what you were doing when you were thirty. Or if you're not thirty yet (why are you reading this!? I try not to know people who are younger than me. :D), tell me what you think you'll be doing when you're thirty. Drop me a line - operators are standing by.
I count myself lucky because my regrets are few and I realize that even the things that I wish I could change are done and not worth rehashing ad nauseum. Having said that, there are a few changes that I'm going to be working to implement in the next thirty years. They're all basically related.
First, I'm going to grow a thicker skin. I've always been ultra-sensitive and my feelings are easily hurt. Being the brunt of a joke has never been something I've been particularly good at but I'm working on it. I'm not going to let people's remarks bother me and make me feel bad anymore. (If anyone knows how to do this, please email me.) :D
Second, I'm going to stop worrying so much about what people think of me. Mike loves me. My dad loves me. Jeff loves me. My in-laws love me (and really, what's not to love? ;)) . That's a great support system right there and I don't care what the rest of the world thinks of me!
Third, I'm going to allow myself to get angry! But I won't let it ruin my good time. Once, right after Matt died (I mean less than two weeks), I was talking to a friend of mine whose brother had just been in a car accident. She told me that she was so happy he was alive because if he'd died she didn't know if she could have gone on living. Now I was happy that her brother was alright but it seemed to me to be a rather heartless thing to say to someone who'd lost a brother two weeks before. She could have stabbed me in the chest and it would have hurt less than those words. It hurt so bad that for a moment it took my breath away. I wanted to punch her in the face and scream at her but I just retreated into myself and never said a word. To this day I have never told her how upset I was at what she'd said. I was too worried that I'd somehow make her angry with me and she "wouldn't like me anymore." So instead of speaking up and clearing the air, I bottled it inside and simmered about it for weeks. Punching her in the face would have been the wrong thing to do but I wish I'd said to her, "That remark really upset me and it's bothering me." I don't believe it was her intent to make me feel bad but because I didn't say anything, I spent weeks brooding and obsessing about her thoughtless comment until my anger consumed me. I wasn't able to have any sort of fun at all until I finally was able to let it go. It's the same sort of thing with my birthday party. There were a handful of people who had RSVP'd that they'd show up and then never did. While I still believe it's rude to not call me and tell me you wouldn't make it (I was buying food, for pete's sake) - I will politely be letting them know that I would appreciate a call next time - I refused to let it ruin my night then and I'm beyond stressing about it now. And that feels REALLY good. Before, I would have at least spent the next week wondering if this signaled that you didn't like me anymore or felt like I was boring. Now I'm just so happy to have been able to spend time with the people who could make it. By the way, though...if you weren't there... You. Missed. Out. Ha! It was awesome!
Fourth, I will not longer be a friendship lifesupport machine. Friendships come and go and I'm going to accept that. There are a few friendships that I've held onto and refused to let die a natural death. There have not been any big fights - no blow ups. Just the naturally progression of life. One of the best and the worst things about life is the way that it is always changing. Births, deaths, marriages, divorces, new jobs, new homes, moving, new friendships - they happen every day. Sometimes, despite their best intentions, people are simply too busy to devote the time necessary to keeping friendships alive. I have a hard time realizing this is the case and letting go. Sometimes when people say, "We've got to get together and do something soon!" - what they are really saying is "I like you but I am way too busy to do anything." I don't realize the difference and so I keep working to pin point a time when we can get together and am, inevitably, disappointed when they cancel at the last minute because something's come up or they simply don't respond to my email and/or phone message until it's too late to do whatever I suggested. So in my next thirty years, I'm going to remember that it's ok to let go sometimes. I'm not going to be rude to anyone or attempt to "punish" anyone. And, I'd like to specifically state that I'm not threatening to cut anybody off if they don't call me right away! I'm also not speaking to anyone in particular but rather using a general "you" to mean anyone - everyone. I'll always be here for anyone who needs me. But I'm going to let people come to me a little more. If you want to hang out or have dinner, give me a call and I will jump at the chance! If you have to cancel...no hard feelings! Call me sometime when you're available again. But I (probably) won't be calling you to reschedule. I'm going to go with the flow and let life lead me instead of trying to control every aspect of the world around me. If you don't don't have time to pal around with me - no problem. That's cool...maybe in a year or two your life will have shifted and our schedules will realign and you'll give me a call. But if not, I'll always remember the times we spent together, think of you fondly and continue to wish you well in any and everything that you do. Maybe you'll send me a postcard from wherever you're vacationing because you were in the gift shop and suddenly remembered how much I love getting postcards. Maybe we'll run into each other in the street when we're in our sixties and we'll stop to grab a drink and spend an afternoon saying, "Remember that time when we..." and sharing a few more laughs. No matter what - I'm always available for advice, a chat, a laugh or to lend a hand.
In the meantime, I feel really good about the decisions I've made. I'm working to make my life reflect the Tim McGraw song. In my next thirty years I'm going to cry a little less, laugh a little more and find a world of happiness.
I'm interested to know what you were doing when you were thirty. Or if you're not thirty yet (why are you reading this!? I try not to know people who are younger than me. :D), tell me what you think you'll be doing when you're thirty. Drop me a line - operators are standing by.
3/17/2007
3/14/2007
It never fails
Whenever we're expecting company, Mike goes into a cleaning frenzy. Usually I'm like, "What's the problem? It's clean!" With me being in school and Mike working, though, I knew the place needed some work. Last weekend we cleaned all day Saturday and got most of the place looking pretty good. The room we didn't get to? The bathroom. I said I'd do it. Actually the conversation went like this.
Cindi: How are we going to do the cleaning?
Mike: We'll divide it up and each do different rooms.
Cindi: I suppose I get the bathroom.
Mike: (pause) (sigh) I guess I can do the bathroom.
Cindi: Well, let's do the rest of the place and we can double team the bathroom.
So we cleaned the rest of the house and were too, too tired to finish the bathroom. I figured we'd get it the next day. Turns out Mike had a full schedule the next day. Anyway, the bathroom cleaning has fallen to me. Every day, as he goes out the door to work, Mike says, "Don't forget WE have to clean the bathroom this week." Right. We. Heh.
I've told that story to relate this one. I was cleaning the bathtub faucet today when I managed to turn the shower on myself. I think I'm done cleaning the bathroom for today.
Cindi: How are we going to do the cleaning?
Mike: We'll divide it up and each do different rooms.
Cindi: I suppose I get the bathroom.
Mike: (pause) (sigh) I guess I can do the bathroom.
Cindi: Well, let's do the rest of the place and we can double team the bathroom.
So we cleaned the rest of the house and were too, too tired to finish the bathroom. I figured we'd get it the next day. Turns out Mike had a full schedule the next day. Anyway, the bathroom cleaning has fallen to me. Every day, as he goes out the door to work, Mike says, "Don't forget WE have to clean the bathroom this week." Right. We. Heh.
I've told that story to relate this one. I was cleaning the bathtub faucet today when I managed to turn the shower on myself. I think I'm done cleaning the bathroom for today.
3/13/2007
I stole this from Kelly
YOUR REAL NAME
Lucinda (Cindi)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Cindizzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fav color and fav animal):
Red Weiner Dog
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Lee Denise
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
kurlupar
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
purple daquiri
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Ureaojn
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Ruby Swede or Nola Clyde
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Meadow
Lucinda (Cindi)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Cindizzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fav color and fav animal):
Red Weiner Dog
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and childhood street)
Lee Denise
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 3 letters of mom's maiden name)
kurlupar
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
purple daquiri
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)
Ureaojn
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (grandmother/grandfather's first name):
Ruby Swede or Nola Clyde
YOUR GOTH NAME (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Meadow
3/09/2007
Download this song!
Ok, I adore this song. I hear it on the radio every so often and Mike sings it to me in the car sometimes. It's just a sort of silly song that makes me laugh and I love, love, love it when Mike sings it to me. I'm posting it because I finally broke down and bought it from I-tunes. Ah, yes.
She is My Everything - John Prine
She is my everything
From her suntanned shoulders
Down to the freckles
On her wedding ring
Her feet are so warm
They could melt the snow
In the early Spring
She is my everything
She goes everywhere
from Copenhagen
To making eggs and bacon
down in Jackson Square
I'd like to drive a Cadillac
The color of her long black hair
She goes everywhere
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She uses Ever-ready
batteries to keep
Her electrical appliances
a-going steady
She can do fourteen things at once
And then her phone'll ring
She is my everything
She knows everybody
From Muhammad Ali
To teaching Bruce Lee
How to do karate
She can lead a parade
While putting on her shades
In her Masarati
She knows everybody
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She is my everything
When she wakes up in the morning
That's when the birdies
Start to sing
When I hear her voice
I'll tell you boys
I forget everything
She is my everything
She is my everything
She is My Everything - John Prine
She is my everything
From her suntanned shoulders
Down to the freckles
On her wedding ring
Her feet are so warm
They could melt the snow
In the early Spring
She is my everything
She goes everywhere
from Copenhagen
To making eggs and bacon
down in Jackson Square
I'd like to drive a Cadillac
The color of her long black hair
She goes everywhere
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She uses Ever-ready
batteries to keep
Her electrical appliances
a-going steady
She can do fourteen things at once
And then her phone'll ring
She is my everything
She knows everybody
From Muhammad Ali
To teaching Bruce Lee
How to do karate
She can lead a parade
While putting on her shades
In her Masarati
She knows everybody
Kisses that come
all the way from China
Kinda remind her
of memories of Spain
If I get lost you can always find her
Standing right beside me in the rain
She is my everything
When she wakes up in the morning
That's when the birdies
Start to sing
When I hear her voice
I'll tell you boys
I forget everything
She is my everything
She is my everything
3/08/2007
I quit the blog again
But I only quit for a few days this time. Every time I'd start to write something before all I would be able to talk about is how much I hate people and wish they'd all drop off the face of the earth. This has been for a few reasons.
1. Finals - hate 'em
2. Stupid birthday party - big mess now. Wish I'd never had the idea sometimes. Mike can't decide what we should do at the party...he only knows that he hates any ideas I've come up with. He shoots them down and then will ask me the next day, "So what are we going to do/eat at the party?" Small prospective turn out at first made me feel undervalued - have decided to make this a positive...will save money!
3. Feel unappreciated. No reason...general ugly depression has descended and left me with "Nobody loves me" feelings.
4. Have lost cell phone in house. I had it when I came home Tuesday night but the battery was almost dead. Didn't notice where I set it down and now it's dead and I can't call it to figure out where it is. It's in a coat pocket or a bag or under a stack of school papers somewhere. Stupid cell phones. I had it with me on the way home because I had called Mike to let him know where I was - I just was distracted and didn't watch where I put it. On the positive side, I pulled out my old one and it looks like it will work if I buy new battery for it. So if worse comes to worse, I'm still ok.
5. Writing teacher gave me a lower grade on my case brief saying my legal issue "needed revision" even though it was the right issue - she didn't like the way I worded it...which was straight out of the case, by the way. But then she gave another student (who had an extra wrong issue) an A. How is it an A if you have a wrong issue but not when you have the right one? This is reason I didn't watch where I set down cell phone - I was so mad about this that I was foaming at the mouth.
6. Don't know what to get Mike for birthday. Don't have any money of own to do this and feel awkward buying gift for him with his own money. Yes, I know it's "our" money but he's earning all of it right now.
7. Stupid birthday - don't want to have birthday without Mom. This is the crux of entire depression.
But then today, I was doing some stuff around the house with the satellite radio playing on the tv. I flipped to Hair Nation just in time to hear "Final Countdown" beginning. This restored some of my good humor as it has become a bit of a joke between Mike and I. I was talking about my birthday, the party and turning thirty and he started to sing/hum the beginning to "Final Countdown." Then every time I would think about what/when/where to have the party, I would realize after a few minutes that I was hearing the song in my head. I finally gave in and downloaded it from Itunes.
Ok - good mood's over. Fair warning - I am thoroughly unpleasant at this point in time. I strive to be in a better mood when Andrea, Bob and Kristie arrive but until then I make no promises.
1. Finals - hate 'em
2. Stupid birthday party - big mess now. Wish I'd never had the idea sometimes. Mike can't decide what we should do at the party...he only knows that he hates any ideas I've come up with. He shoots them down and then will ask me the next day, "So what are we going to do/eat at the party?" Small prospective turn out at first made me feel undervalued - have decided to make this a positive...will save money!
3. Feel unappreciated. No reason...general ugly depression has descended and left me with "Nobody loves me" feelings.
4. Have lost cell phone in house. I had it when I came home Tuesday night but the battery was almost dead. Didn't notice where I set it down and now it's dead and I can't call it to figure out where it is. It's in a coat pocket or a bag or under a stack of school papers somewhere. Stupid cell phones. I had it with me on the way home because I had called Mike to let him know where I was - I just was distracted and didn't watch where I put it. On the positive side, I pulled out my old one and it looks like it will work if I buy new battery for it. So if worse comes to worse, I'm still ok.
5. Writing teacher gave me a lower grade on my case brief saying my legal issue "needed revision" even though it was the right issue - she didn't like the way I worded it...which was straight out of the case, by the way. But then she gave another student (who had an extra wrong issue) an A. How is it an A if you have a wrong issue but not when you have the right one? This is reason I didn't watch where I set down cell phone - I was so mad about this that I was foaming at the mouth.
6. Don't know what to get Mike for birthday. Don't have any money of own to do this and feel awkward buying gift for him with his own money. Yes, I know it's "our" money but he's earning all of it right now.
7. Stupid birthday - don't want to have birthday without Mom. This is the crux of entire depression.
But then today, I was doing some stuff around the house with the satellite radio playing on the tv. I flipped to Hair Nation just in time to hear "Final Countdown" beginning. This restored some of my good humor as it has become a bit of a joke between Mike and I. I was talking about my birthday, the party and turning thirty and he started to sing/hum the beginning to "Final Countdown." Then every time I would think about what/when/where to have the party, I would realize after a few minutes that I was hearing the song in my head. I finally gave in and downloaded it from Itunes.
Ok - good mood's over. Fair warning - I am thoroughly unpleasant at this point in time. I strive to be in a better mood when Andrea, Bob and Kristie arrive but until then I make no promises.
3/02/2007
The thrift store book or More than I bargained for...
We're going to Michigan tonight. I had forgotten to go to the library earlier in the week to get a couple of books for the ride and I was thinking about whether or not I had the ambition to get up and head that way before Mike gets home. I don't, by the way. Then I remembered that the other day, Mike dropped me off at the thrift store and said I should get a couple of cheap books. I proceeded to get about 20...hey, they were 25 and 50 cents! Get off my back! Anyway, I've read most of them but as I sat here thinking about going to the library, I realized that I'd set aside a couple of the books and hadn't even touched them yet. I picked them up to see if they were acceptable and saw that I'd bought Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh even though I'd once read it years ago. I can never resist buying a book I've read before (and liked) from a thrift store. I re-read books over and over - so 25 cents is a small investment to pay for the enjoyment I'll get from them. I'd read this book before - years and years before. In fact, right now I don't even really remember much about it at all. That's how long ago it's been.
I picked it up and looked at it. I turned it over and looked at the reviews on the back of the book jacket. Then I tossed it down onto table and turned to get a bottle of water from the fridge. When I turned around, I saw that it had landed and opened. On the blank page at the front was a handwritten note.
6-12-87
Dear Kristin
At your age, you probably will wonder why I gave you this book.
At 20, you will think it an interesting collection of thoughts written by an old woman.
But at 30, and every year after you will find this book has not only found a place in your heart, but the truth it contains will have a place in your life.
Enjoy - many times,
Dareen Barlow
I made a cup of hot tea, held the book and thought about it while I sipped. I'm fascinated. Who is Kristin? Who is Dareen Barlow? Why is she giving Kristin this book? How old was Kristin when she got the book? How old is she now? Why doesn't she still have it? Did something happen to her? Did she give up on understanding the metaphor? Did she become disillusioned with life and get rid of all of the leftover trinkets from her childhood? What disillusioned her? Was it a man? It had to be a man - it's always a man. Was it unrequited love? Was it a divorce? Did he leave her for the nanny? Why is it always the nanny?! Or her sister! Oh, my God...he left her for her sister and now the whole family's torn apart. What did she do then? Did she go back to school and make a better life for herself or did she fall into a deep depression and resort to plastic surgery to fix her perceived flaws which she feels drove her husband to prefer her sister? Or did she take up with a much younger man and move to St. Martinque? With the millions of dollars that she got from her husband when she and her lawyer gouged him in the divorce settlement. Ha ha! Adultery's a bitch - serves you right, you jerk!
I suddenly realized I'd spent an hour and a half thinking about this and inventing scenarios, each more outrageous than the last. Who needs a book for entertainment?! Not me.
I picked it up and looked at it. I turned it over and looked at the reviews on the back of the book jacket. Then I tossed it down onto table and turned to get a bottle of water from the fridge. When I turned around, I saw that it had landed and opened. On the blank page at the front was a handwritten note.
6-12-87
Dear Kristin
At your age, you probably will wonder why I gave you this book.
At 20, you will think it an interesting collection of thoughts written by an old woman.
But at 30, and every year after you will find this book has not only found a place in your heart, but the truth it contains will have a place in your life.
Enjoy - many times,
Dareen Barlow
I made a cup of hot tea, held the book and thought about it while I sipped. I'm fascinated. Who is Kristin? Who is Dareen Barlow? Why is she giving Kristin this book? How old was Kristin when she got the book? How old is she now? Why doesn't she still have it? Did something happen to her? Did she give up on understanding the metaphor? Did she become disillusioned with life and get rid of all of the leftover trinkets from her childhood? What disillusioned her? Was it a man? It had to be a man - it's always a man. Was it unrequited love? Was it a divorce? Did he leave her for the nanny? Why is it always the nanny?! Or her sister! Oh, my God...he left her for her sister and now the whole family's torn apart. What did she do then? Did she go back to school and make a better life for herself or did she fall into a deep depression and resort to plastic surgery to fix her perceived flaws which she feels drove her husband to prefer her sister? Or did she take up with a much younger man and move to St. Martinque? With the millions of dollars that she got from her husband when she and her lawyer gouged him in the divorce settlement. Ha ha! Adultery's a bitch - serves you right, you jerk!
I suddenly realized I'd spent an hour and a half thinking about this and inventing scenarios, each more outrageous than the last. Who needs a book for entertainment?! Not me.
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